What Now

It's 2:03 am and I can't sleep. It has nothing to do with caffine or chocolate tonight, but it has everything to do with being afraid.

When I got home today, I had a message on my machine from the mother of a very, very good friend of mine. She called to tell me that my friend is in the hospital in critical condition due to a rather sudden, and severe, medical problem, and that things aren't looking very good for her.

Deep down inside, in the places where the sun never truly reaches but things are still very clear, I believe she'll be okay. I have to believe it.

All I can think about is that I never sent her a birthday card. That doesn't make sense to me, exactly, but it won't leave me alone.

Her mom said that at one point, they gave her a 50/50 chance, but they're doctors, right? They can fix just about anything. I have to believe that too.

I have a lot of friends, close friends, but I've only had a few that I could tell anything to. She is one of them, and those ranks are already getting thinner every day.

All I can do is pray. Please do the same.