What Now

I'm officially stressed.

Yesterday when I went to the doc for a physical, I told him about the headaches I've been having. I thought they were sinus headaches (of which I am not unfamilliar) but when I told them where they were, he told me I was having "tension headaches". Well, shock my drawers...could I possibly be tense? You think? Today will be the first of two final exams this week, and then I will have to finish my lithography prints to turn in by tuesday of next week. It'll be a miracle if I don't have a complete cardiac episode before all of this is over with. Last night I tried studying for my algebra exam, and not one thing on my study guide has stuck in my head. This specific exam is going to be over everything we've learned this semester. I don't remember everything we've learned this semester!!!!!!! Steve figured it up, and even though I don't need to make an exceptionally high grade to pass the class, I'm scared that with the epic "nothingness" that is in my brain this morning, I will not make even that! Then I have to come home and study for my history exam that I'll have tomorrow afternoon, and I'm sorry, but most cathedrals look the same to me. My head has been crammed with transepts, flying butresses, scissor vaults and stained glass. To be quite honest, I've been so focused on the Stupid Paper, that when I think of medieval churches, all I can see in my head is the Arena Chapel, which we didn't even study!!! ACK! Please pray for me. I'm going to need it!

Yoga Breath....Yoga Breath...Yoga Breath....

On lighter topics:

I get to add "cruel to animals" onto my weird next door neighbor title. Yesterday, I had to come home early to let the exterminator in, so apparently I was here in time to actually see the elusive kids that live next door. I heard this awful barking sound and a child screaming, so I look out the window to see my dogs playing the "I'm going to eat your face" game with Cleatus and Kay Bob (neighbor dogs) through the fence, while the kids are egging them on.

Now, I may have two of the cutest dogs in the world, but they can't be accused of being the smartest dogs in the world. When they get worked up around a new dog, and that dog is out of their reach, Butler and Bear turn on each other in the "Alpha Dog Caged Death Match". To be fair, Bear usually forgets that he's smaller than Butler and starts the fight, but Butler, being bigger and stronger, will get the upper hand...er...paw.

Anyways, the barking and the screaming seemed to be getting a little raucous, so I am walking out the door to bring them in and put them in the kennel, when I beging to hear the unmistakble sounds of "Dogs of the Serengeti" snarling and mauling each other. So I run to the door, rip it open, and do my shrill football whistle (which still amazes and delights those who don't realize I can make a sound like that) but it does nothing to get the dogs apart. The children are all standing still and watching wide-eyed as Butler goes all Mr. Hyde on Bear and has him by the throat on the ground trying to kill him. So I go to plan B: I grab the water bucket and run as fast as I can across the yard, spilling water all over my yoga pants and qualifying for the neighborhood wet tee-shirt contest in the process. Well, the dogs see me coming, but they aren't ready to break it up yet, so they sort of roll away from me, but I aimed and got them both with the bucket of water. The same bucket of water that was probably close to freezing cold. That did it. They broke apart and ran for the house, and I'm standing there wet, while the neighbor kids are looking at me. I just turned on my patented "Southern Belle" smile and said "I'm sorry, ya'll!" and did my pagent wave as I turned back towards the house and went in. The poor dogs were soaked and cold, and they kept looking at me like "What was THAT for?! We were only trying to kill one another! It's what dogs DO!" When I closed them up in their kennels and sat on the couch, they glowered, yes GLOWERED, at me while they licked their feet dry. I don't even want to know what those kids told their parents!