SPECIAL EDITION!

BIRTHDAY UPDATE

Hi everyone! Sorry it's taken me so long to actually do this, but I've had a rough couple of days getting in contact with my blog account. I really, really want to beat down our system admin. He's just being a jerk. That isn't just my opinion, it's the opinion of the IT dude who works for him.

But I digress.

OK, so my birthday.

I actually had every intention of staying at home, literally in my bed all day so that the bad luck of my birthday couldn't taint too many of you fine people. However, after talking to two very wise people (Kenny and Steve) I realize it was kind of dumb for me to think my birthday is cursed. I'm still not convinced that there isn't something wrong with the universe on that day, but maybe not as serious as a curse. So the night before (Feb. 13th), I came home from work and gave Steve his Valentine's Day card. Sappy and silly, I know, but I don't want to ruin it for him. After the candy debacle of the week before, I had pretty much given up on getting him anything like a gift, but luckily for me I ran across a Han Solo figure that he didn't even know existed! Can you believe it?! Me, finding a Han Solo figure he was unaware of! Miracle of miracles!

I am the most Awesome. Wife. Ever. No matter what he says.

Anyway. I gave him his card and when I walked into my office, there upon my office chair was my birthday gift. Steve had gotten me a WACOM tablet for my G5. If you don't already know what that is, it's kind of hard to explain. I will describe it as USB powered awesomness. Basically it's a drawing thingie for my Mac. It will be very helpful in my design work. I was very glad, because I had mentioned that I wanted one of them and he listened! Go Steve! So while I'm looking over my new toy, he asked if I wanted anything for Valentine's Day too. It's no secret that I love presents, so of course I said I did. He said he'd have to go find something. So he comes back into the living room and hands me one of these:

I was a little blown away because A: Once again, we have what is obviously jewelry (and he has told me that jewelry is a waste of money) and B: It's from frakin' Tiffany's! So I opened the lovely little robin's egg blue box to find this:



Since I love the ocean and I love stars, he got me a starfish pendant! Isn't it pretty? It's funny, because I had been saving up to buy this for myself, but he gave it too before I had the chance. So of course I was thrilled.

Then, of course, I kind of felt shoddy about the Han Solo figure. But in Steve's head, I think we are even. : )

I got many lovely gifts and cards from many of you and if I haven't already thanked you, I'm doing it again! THANK YOU!

On the morning of my actual birthday, I woke up at exactly 2:00 am and couldn't go back to sleep. I wasn't excited about it being my birthday but I think I was a little scared. This was the day I had chosen to use positive thinking so that I could have a wonderful birthday! So far, things didn't seem to be going all that hot. It was early, cold, and I was not ready to be awake. However, my brain said I couldn't sleep anymore, so I went into my office.

That is a picture of my feet. For my long time readers (all three of you) this won't have to be explained.

Ignore the dirty socks, but the dogs wanted to go outside and I couldn't find my slippers.

So I played a few rounds of Mah Jong to make myself sleepy. I played it and couldn't get past level 14 for the life of me. I know I played it solidly for 2 hours or more, but I couldn't figure out the stupid thing. I finally got sleepy enough to go back to bed.

Birthday 1 Kelly 0

It didn't last long, though. At 6:00, I was wide awake again. I had decided that I was going to do all kinds of fun, girly stuff that I never get a chance to do since I had taken the day off of work. Of course, it took me a while to get motivated.

The first thing I did was give myself a pedicure. I'd love to go have this done professionally, but my feet are so ticklish that I'm afraid I'd kick some tiny Asian lady in the head if she touched them wrong, so I did it myself.

My feet were so slippery for the foot lotion stuff that I had bought, that I almost fell and broke my leg.

Birthday 2 Kelly o




I decided to get ready and go out to do some things. I had a whole day of stuff lined up, because I was SURE that as long as I stayed busy, everything would be fine. I was just about to get dressed when I realized that I had never washed any of my jeans. So I did some laundry.

That took forever.

However, no worries. I was soon as gorgeous as I could possibly make myself and onward to my day!







My first stop was going to be the mall so I could get my hair cut. I'm letting it grow out, but I needed to get the split ends trimmed. I'm thinking: It's Wednesday, the mall has JUST opened, this shouldn't take any time at all!


Wrong. I made it to the mall, but there was only one stylist at the place, and she didn't know how long it would be before I could be fit in.

No problem, I said, and removed my name from the list.

Birthday 3 Kelly 0




OK, then. The next thing on my agenda was that I was going to go to the library and check out some audio novels that I could put on my iPod. I like to listen to books while I work because it keeps me focused. I know that our library has a really big audio/visual area, so I figured I'd get about three books and have them for days that I have long, tedious projects.

Wrong again. Apparently they have about 9,000 audio novels on cassette tape, but only about 16 on CD. 14 of those are the Bible and self-help books.

Birthday 4 Kelly o






You know, granted, these aren't big problems or anything, but the day started to get a little frustrating. Pretty much everything I had planned was going wrong. Of course I kept on keeping on, because I figured that eventually something would go right. I was determined to have a good dang birthday! However, for the time being, I stopped taking pictures to focus on trying to enjoy myself.

So from the library to an antique store I went. I love going to antique stores because I love things that have history. Plus, you never know when you go into a place and find something wonderful and old, possible all scratched to heck - but who cares. It's perfect! Well, the antique store I picked wasn't like that. Oh don't get me wrong, there were tons of beautiful things in the store, but I didn't have enough money to buy anything. In fact, I'm pretty sure I didn't have enough money to breathe on anything in that store. This was one of those places where you buy antiques because you have a house in New England that was once owned by George Washington and you need furniture of the correct time period to compliment the elaborate crown mouldings in the parlor. I was so scared I was going to knock something over! I wondered about, trying to look like I had money and kept my hands in my pockets. When I overheard the little British lady who owned the store talking about the 17th (or maybe 18th) century armoire that they had, I had to leave. One sneeze, and I would have to sell my kidneys on e-bay to pay for something. From there I went to a used book store and went a little nuts. I seriously need to stop buying books. I have a lot of them I have yet to read and I'm running out of places to put them all.

During the book store incident, I realized I hadn't eaten all day. It's a rare day when I forget to eat, people. Seriously, I was FOCUSED! My plan was to go to Cracker Barrel and get take out. Since I had dinner with Kenny there a couple of weeks ago, I had been having a serious jones for another one of their cheeseburgers. I don't know why, but that is what I wanted. So onward to Cracker Barrel, or so I thought. Somehow, somewhere I took a wrong road. I'm driving along, minding my own business, when I realize "Hey. I don't know where I am!" Soon enough, I realize I had somehow turned on the road that would take me straight out to Redstone Arsenal. If you've never tried to get on base, you probably have never seen this 900 mile long, no turns, surrounded by marshes and woods, wasteland that leads directly to a gate where two or more soldiers with M-16s are standing there waiting to do cavity searches on anyone who doesn't have a sticker thingie. I start to panic a little and begin a mental inventory of anything I might be carrying that could be considered a weapon. Lucky for me, there was a U-turn lane about 100 feet from the gate, so I got turned around the right way and headed on.

Birthday 5 Kelly 0

By this time I am past hungry and starting to get light headed and mean. I'm glad no one was with me, because I'm afraid I would have been snappish to them. I already know that I was extremely rude to the entire senior citizen population of Huntsville, which decided to come out and drive 25 miles an hour, not use the blinkers, and swerve from lane to lane regardless of the amount of traffic around them. I'm just glad they couldn't hear me. They would have been scandalized. I FINALLY made it to the restaurant and put in my order.

About an hour later I got my lunch.

I was all but gnawing on my purse straps from hunger, but luckily the food came out just in time to prevent that. I also bought myself a t-shirt that says "Official Old Fogey" from the gift shop. Then I went home. I was tired of trying to enjoy myself. So I changed into my new shirt and a pair of yoga pants and ate my lunch. It was just as Yummy as I thought it would be. After that, I took a nap.
Yes, that's me and my dragonfly slippers, and yes I took a picture of myself about to take a nap. I don't remember much after that picture, though, until Steve came home from work.

Birthday 5 Kelly 1

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA! In your FACE, Birthday!


We talked for a few minutes and then he fell asleep. I was awake by then, so I got up and worked on one of my projects.

Once Steve woke up, I was ready to go and do something. However, we both realized how very little we have in common when we couldn't think of anything we'd like to do. Together.

So he watched Stargate. I played Mah Jong.

I had come full circle. My birthday was done for another year.

Thank GOD!

Yikes.

Sorry this will be so short, but I'm running late for everything this morning!

I suppose you are probably relieved (I hope) that I was not destroyed on my birthday. It wasn't a great day, but it wasn't terrible either. I hope to write about it as soon as I can. Normally I would do this from work, but the Network Admin. at the SProcket has decided to block nearly everything one can get to on the internet. No, that isn't an exaggeration at all. I'm blocked from Blogger at the moment.

Anyways, as soon as I can get a few minutes, I'll fill you all in. I even have pictures! Yay!

As most of you know, today is my birthday. I am 29. For a normal person, this would be a time to celebrate or lament. However, I am doing neither. I am very likely hiding out somewhere in my home, trying my best to contain the jinx that plagues me and those around me. I believe very much that the only thing I've ever done to cause this jinx is to have the audacity to want to have a good birthday. So, because I am now probably in my hall closet with a flashlight and a MRE at my elbow so that I don't have to go anywhere and taint anyone else's day, I wanted to go ahead and apologize in case my bad luck infects any of you. Oh yes, it has done it before, and usually to the people I love most.

If at some point today you find yourself engaged to, married to, or impregnated by, someone whom you'd rather not be...I'm sorry.

If you find out you have a nasty disease or a fatal wound of some kind...I'm sorry.

If your house is suddenly plagued with paranormal activity...call TAPS...and I'm sorry.

If you have an accident or get murdered in some horrible way...I'm sorry.

If an ex boyfriend/girlfriend shows up at your house and takes you prisoner and you have to be smoked out of the hostage situation with tear gas bombs...I'm sorry.

If you wake up expecting breakfast in bed or roses (after all, it is Valentine's Day, too) and you are disappointed...I'm sorry.

If the romantic candles you placed in your bedroom catch the curtains on fire and you have to be rescued by a big, burly fireman...your welcome...and I'm sorry.

If you are secretly in love with someone and you find out they are getting married, or are gay...I'm sorry.

If you are attacked by penguins in the middle of a desert...I'm sorry.

If your favorite TV show is preempted by a State of the Union address, or weather coverage...I'm sorry.

If a dog steps in your dessert...I'm sorry.

If you get into a fight and wind up not speaking to someone you dearly love...I'm sorry.

If you happen to realize that your significant other completely forgot to get you anything for Valentine's Day and they give you a crappy gift that wasn't intended for you to begin with, but they give it to you so that you will think that they just have really bad taste instead of just not thinking about you...I'm sorry.

If you lean out of your top floor window after you take a shower to get a better look at who is driving into the garage of your next door neighbor, fall out of said window leaving your towel behind caught on the window latch, land naked and unconscious into your begonias and are arrested for public lewdness...well, you shouldn't be so nosy, but also, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry if you have a bad day. I didn't do it on purpose, I swear. However, it's probably my fault anyways, even though I'd never wish any of that stuff on anyone ever. All I can ask is for forgiveness and a wide berth each February 14th. Tomorrow I'll give you an update and let you know how things went. If I'm still alive, that is! : )

WEEKEND UPDATE!

Greetings everyone! I hope you all had lovely weekends, as I did.

Friday I came home from work and crashed while Steve watched more Stargate SG1 and other various TV shows we had on the DVR. We might have even talked to each other, but I can't remember. I spent most of my evening playing Mah Jhong (is that even close?), trying to sew some patches onto Velcro for one of Steve's jackets and embroidering some napkins that I'm giving a friend of mine who is getting married in March. I'm begging again, no one else get married this year...PLEASE.
I'm actually getting pretty good at the embroidery, but it's tough on my eyes. Oh well, what more noble way of going blind than by sacrificing one's senses to your art? Nah, don't worry. I'm not that crazy yet. Give me a couple of years.

Saturday was another one of those days that I meant to get more done than I actually did. I managed to do laundry and run errands, but that is about where it ended. I wasn't feeling well, so I fell asleep. Steve was helping out with some stuff at the Space Dome, so I had just gotten up when he came home. Then he fell asleep. It was a most unproductive day! Quite honestly, I don't remember what else I did that day, but I'm sure it involved Stargate playing in the background. : )

Sunday was church, and then onto my parents house for lunch. It was a special lunch because it was my birthday lunch with my family. Well, almost all of my family. My brother-in-law didn't feel obligated to come, but that's okay. At least he didn't spend the whole meal jumping up from the table to see which NASCAR was in the lead, per his usual. Heeheehee. We had a good time. My mom made all kinds of wonderful, bad for me food and then the best part, the coconut birthday cake. YUMMMMM. I wish I could share a piece with you all, because you'd love it too! My nephew, Logan, who is twelve and starting to act his age, came over to my seat with a tub of Cool-Whip. He had a spoon full of it, so I thought he was going to either put it on my plate or feed it to me. Apparently, my spidey sense isn't as sharp as it used to be, owing to my advanced age, so I didn't suspect anything was amiss. I suppose that feeding it to me was the closest I had gotten in my own guess, because he not only stuck the spoon in my mouth, but he also smeared whipped cream all over my face, up my nose and in my right ear! I had a horrible flashback of a wedding I went to where the groom (the evil Hastared) smeared cake all over the bride. I was too shocked to react, and so was everyone else! I wanted to laugh, but I was afraid I'd snort cool-whip up my nose. It was too funny. I probably shouldn't have laughed, but other than the whipped cream up my nose, it was actually pretty funny! I'm such a bad influence! : ) Steve and I had to leave a little earlier than we normally would so I could get back to church to take the minutes for a sunday school teacher's meeting. I also sang last night. "Via Dolorosa" is a wonderful song, but I have the worst fear that I wasn't pronouncing any of the Spanish right! Of well, everyone seemed to like it. : ) After church, Steve and I got dinner and watched...no, not Stargate...Walk the Line. It bored me. Well, most of it did, anyways. The Pheonix formerly known as Leaf (mainly because I can't spell his real name) could really sing like Johnny Cash. I had never heard June Carter Cash sing, so I have no idea if Reece Witherspoon sounded anything like her, but I thought she did a good job anyways. Other than that, I was unimpressed. Sorry there, folks.

Well, that is it for my weekend! Don't forget that Wednesday is Valentine's day! Make sure to remember all of the people you love. Not that you should need a special day for that, but it at least gives you an excuse to buy them chocolate. :)

Hmmmmm... I'm not sure how this worked out. I promise the questions I answered didn't seem to have anything to do with my results. But, hey...I'm not going to complain.

What type of chocolate are you?
Cherry Liquer

You are sexy and seductive and love to be intimate. You love a man without a shirt and are very passionate.

Take this test

Just what I needed. A new reason to be freaked out by bananas.

Banana Snake will bite off your lips!

I'd like to introduce you to my very first "Person of the Day®"!

My Favorite Kenny.

Why is he my Person of the Day®, you may be asking yourself? Last night we met in Cullman again for dinner and finally exchanged Christmas gifts. Apart from the fact that we had a very fun evening (and unlike normal we didn't spend hours driving around trying to decide where we were going to eat) part of his very generous, and probably more than I actually deserve, gift was 2 boxes of Godiva chocolate. I had some of it for breakfast this morning.

Anyone who can start off my day with fancy chocolate is #1 with me.

Congratulations, Kenny! : )

My history teacher has made me mad! We have been discussing a painting from the neoclassic period for the past few class sessions. He had us separate into 4 groups and we had to interpret it from a certain viewpoint from the time it was painted. My group was discussing it from the "gender viewpoint" of 18th century France. I did the research and gave a long and detailed interpretation of the painting when my group was called to talk about it. He disagreed with me about what I thought. Normally that wouldn't bother me. Howoever, today when our group and another group were up to finish our discussions, two other people gave the EXACT same information that I gave and he agreed with them. If I didn't have so much self control, I would have gladly chased him around the room with a Nerf bat.

Where is Joseph when you need him?

I had my weird reoccurring dream again. I can't remember if I ever said anything about it (I probably did) but I've been having the same kind of dream over and over. It's not like a typical reoccurring dream where it's literally the same dream each time, but the same thing happens every time, just in a different setting. Who wants to tell me what it means?

I keep dreaming that I suddenly end up in a play. I'm on stage, or wherever the play is being performed, but I have no idea what to do because I haven't been to any rehersals. I usually just watch what someone else does and follow along, which works out fine, but I feel like I'm very obviously messing up. I never get booed or anything, in fact, I usually get a standing ovation or at least no one says anything to me about looking like I didn't know what I was doing. Only once have I been chased off of the stage, but that was by the director of the play and he was mad that I hadn't been rehersing with the cast rather than being angry because I wasn't doing the performance. When I'm on stage, I'm not scared or nervous, but frustrated because I'm a split second behind on whatever I'm doing because I have to watch to see what I'm supposed to do. Once the performance is over, I'm relieved, but more because I didn't screw up too badly than because the play is over.

I know that dreams mean something, even if it's not world shattering, but I wish I could figure this one out! It's beginning to get annoying.

Greetings, Y'all!

I know you've been waiting all weekend for it, and now it's finally time to get it!

WEEKEND UPDATE!

Yeah, that's right, you know it's what you needed. : )

FRIDAY: I had to do some errands after work on Friday afternoon, so I took my lunch hour at four and got a head start on the traffic. Or at least I thought I would. Apparently, no one in Huntsville works past 3:30 on Fridays except the people here at the center. Weird. Anyways, so I fight traffic and make a run to Hobby Lobby. You will be both shocked and amused to realize that I actually left the store without buying anything! I know, I couldn't believe it either! I was actually looking for something very specific when I went shopping and I couldn't find it anywhere. Very frustrating. So I finally make myself go into Pier 1 and I find a reasonably close copy of what I'm looking for. They actually had exactly what I wanted, but only one of them, so I had to go with a close second. I'm making a wedding gift for a guy I work with, and I was getting something for their kitchen. Needless to say, with the trouble I had finding his gift, he'd better stay married for good this time! I also had to run to Target because Steve had requested that I pick up some soda (or Cokes, if you will). I wound up spending much more time than I had meant to while I was in there. :( Target does that to me. I had decided to suck it up and get into the spirit of Valentine's Day for Steve's sake and buy him a box of chocolates. Target has a lot of cute stuff, but being around all of that cuteness made me throw up in my mouth a little. After that, I picked up dinner and went home. After we ate, Steve went looking for something sweet, and he went through the bags that I had brought home and he found his chocolate. He was good enough not to eat it since I told him it WAS supposed to be his Valentine, but I finally just told him to go ahead because it didn't matter anymore. So much for that then!

SATURDAY: Once again I woke up insanely early, but so did Steve. His dad was going to be coming over to help clear out our fence row and move some branches. We had breakfast and watched last week's Battlestar Galactica since we missed it. I was working on another wedding gift (I ask that no one else get married this year) and cleaning up the house. I thought we were going to have some of our friends over, but we decided to go out to eat with them instead. While I was getting ready, I had some extra time and a box of hot rollers. My hair has grown out a lot since the last time I tried to use them, so I thought I'd see how they worked this time. I looked like Shirley Temple. I mean, that's better than Gilda Radner, I suppose, right? So I walk into the livingroom and show Steve. He laughs. Honestly, I couldn't blame him because I looked fairly crazy. I tried and tried to tame it down, but nothing was working. I just ended up having to go out with a white girl fro. Very nice. Josh and Anthony met us at Ruby Tuesday's and we had a really fun time. Anthony said I looked like someone from an old 20's movie, so Tallulah Bankhead...eat your heart out! During dinner, we talked about everything from telephones to the space time continum and collective unconciousness. We also were posed this question by Anthony: Would you get a tattoo on yourself in order to save the lives of five people you don't know. It sounds like a crazy question, right? I would totally do it. Anthony and Steve wouldn't. That doesn't make them despicable, actually. They said that if they didn't know who they were saving, they could be allowing some horrible person to live and maybe end up destroying the world. Of course, they could also be saving the life of someone who could end up curing cancer, so it's a double edged sword. It was an interesting conversation, anyways.

SUNDAY: We went to church, of course. My friend Christie STILL has not had her baby. She was at church though. Her husband Matt is all nervous and fidgety about it, but that's kind of sweet. There were so many people in our pew that I had to sit my purse on the floor out of the way. This led me to forget it when we left. I didn't realize it until I was at home, and Steve was supposed to meet his friend Brittany to get the next two season's of Stargate (sigh) on DVD from her, so we were going to have to run by church on his way to meet her. He got caught up doing something at home with the TV and so when we got to the church, it was locked and no one was home. Steve and I were freaking out because our church is not exactly in the best neighborhood, and my whole existence seems to be in my purse, but there was nothing we could do at that point and we had to go and get his DVDs. On the way, he realized that he knew were he could get a key, so we planned on getting his DVDs and going back for my purse. So we waited, and waited, and waited. Apparently Brittany had forgotten she was teaching Sunday school and had sent Steve a text message about it - - - which he didn't get. So we sat there for 20 minutes before he called her and found this out. By then it was too late to go back and get the key, so we left my stuff at church and went on to my parent's house. Mom had made a wonderful lunch and then we watched some of the pre-game on the Super Bowl. I care nothing for the Super Bowl, but they were giving bios on the coaches and players from the teams, so it was interesting. After church that night, we went to dinner with two families from our church and watched some of the game at the restaurant.

Good times.

It's snowing again! Big, fat, beautiful flakes of snow! It's not sticking to anything, but I don't care!

Anyways, in my morning procrastinations, I ran across this blog.

Yikes.

But you know, now I'm curious about that. I have an irrational fear that I will become that friend that someone doesn't want, and they'd be too nice to say anything to me, but they might say something about me behind my back. I would truly hate that and I've always told my friends that if they got tired of me, they should just tell me and move on. You know, for closure and stuff. Granted, I don't know one person with the actual stones to do that, so I'm boned.

But, I digress.

What would you do in this person's situation? Me, I don't know. I've only told one person ever that I didn't like them straight out, and even though I REALLY didn't like her, I still feel bad about saying it. So how would you handle that? If you don't want to post a comment, you can e-mail me and tell. I'm just curious to know. It's an interesting look into sociology.

I can't believe that it actually snowed! I was so excited, but then again, snow isn't that common around here. It's so beautiful, even when it isn't thick. It defines all of the hills and rises of the ground around you and makes the world look so different. If I could live on a beach where it occasionally snowed, I'd be in heaven!

Last night I had to go to the grocery store because I needed bread and orange juice. It was a nightmare. I almost didn't go, but I thought that maybe everyone would have sense enough not to freak out and buy up the supplies. I was wrong. All I wanted was some hoagie rolls, but almost everything was gone! I finally found them trapped underneath some other stuff, but only after I looked twice through the aisle. I also wanted some chocolate milk, and lucky for me that was about all that was left. I saw one lady with three (THREE) gallons of milk. What is wrong with these people? Even when it snows, we don't get locked down like some states do. We live in Ala-freakin-bama. The movie "Day After Tomorrow" would literally have to come true before we had weather bad enough to warrant the amount of supplies that people buy when the word "snow" is mentioned. Geez. Of course, this is me -the former grocery store cashier- complaining. I still have Vietnam-like flashbacks of food hoarders from back then.

This morning I did come to work late, but only because I have never driven Lois in bad weather and didn't know how she would handle. The roads were icy, but not too bad. Before I walked into the building, I built a tiny snowman on the retaining wall next to the security guard room. I got a picture of it, but I'll have to post it later when I can transfer images. : )

Well, I'm skipping school this morning to make up lost time at work, so I'd better get going!

RANDOM ACTS OF BLOGGING

* Sarah Silverman is not now, nor has she ever been, funny. Any adult who needs to resort to potty humor and inappropriate jokes to be funny has issues. Maybe I'm alone in this, but I can't for the life of me understand how people who are obviously nothing more than infantile minded tellers of poop, fart, and sex jokes become celebrities. Case in point, Howard Stern. He's a multi-millionaire just for being a mysogonistic pig. Wow. Welcome to America. /rant

*So, Steve and I were not on American Idol last night. Well, we were, but we were in a crowd of 11,000 other people screaming and waving our arms, so unless you have a pretty sharply honed "Kelly Sensor", you couldn't tell where we were. I can't believe how little of the actual crowd footage that was actually used. We stood out there on the steps of the civic center for over an hour waving at the camera and screaming, and then we spent another hour or more singing Sweet Home Alabama, screaming, and waving our arms at the camera. Oh well, as they say, that's showbiz. : ) I'm sort of glad I didn't make it past the first round of auditions after watching the show last night. Simon Cowell is MEAN! I understand why he has to kind of be that way, I guess, but geez. He's a very damaged little man. I remembered seeing a couple of the people who were on the show while I was at the auditions. The girl with long hair especially. I felt so sorry for the people who cried when they were rejected, because I probably would have done the same thing! However, and I say this with no false modesty at all, I know I was better than some of the people they let go to the next round! Of course, maybe I didn't look as if I would make enough of a scene if they were mean to me. They sure didn't judge me right, did they? Heeheehee : )

*I had so much fun in my Theater history class yesterday. We were reading a Greek comedy called (and I don't know if I'm spelling this right) Lysistrata. I got to read the part of Lysistrata for the first act, and I actually enjoyed it. I probably would have liked to have done theater if I had the chance. Maybe I'll audition for the next community theater play and be second sunflower to the left, or something! You'd come and watch, right?

*I have big hair today. Not Trailer-Park big, but big enough for a guy I work with to make a comment. My hair has gotten so long that I don't know what to do with it anymore. I can finally put it in a ponytail for the first time in many years, but I don't like to because it makes my head hurt when I take it out! Clippies! Must get more CLIPPIES!

*The other night one of our dogs got mad at me for not having his food in his bowl on time and he took a poo on the carpet in our bedroom. The sad thing is, we didn't know about it for an hour or so. : ( Neither one of them would own up to it, but I think I know who did it. He was the one who looked the most ashamed of himself when I asked them about it. That has to be the worst thing about owning any kind of animal. Yuck. I'm just glad that Steve doesn't do that when I don't have dinner ready on time!

Wow, I'm suddenly in a very good and somewhat giggly mood.

Maybe I shouldn't have had that seventh margarita at lunch. : )

Here is a random link to some cute puppies.

That is all.

DON'T FORGET!!!!!!!

Tonight is the Birmingham edition of the American Idol auditions. There is a slim to none chance that either Steve or I will be seen, but they did keep the camera on our section during some crowd shots. If nothing else, his huge head may be obvious to anyone looking! Don't forget to watch, just in case!

Sometimes, that whole Baptist thing about not dancing doesn't seem like such a bad idea.

Check out the groom. One had to think he was a little too into it, right?

So funny...

WEEKEND UPDATE!

That's right, folks. It's another issue of Weekend Update, Kelly style!

Friday was work, of course. Our HR senior VP had her retirement party that afternoon, so we all went to say goodbye. I can't remember how long they said she had been here, but they did mention that she had hired over 10,000 people! Of course, you've got to count all of the counselors and temps, but still, that's a heck of a lot! She's a sweet lady, so I hope she enjoys her retirement. Later that evening, Steve and I went to Target and got dinner. When we came home, I had to request that we NOT watch "Stargate SG1" or "Threshold", which he complied with, but we ended up watching the original "Stargate" movie from 1994. I remember renting that when it came out on video, and I remembered liking it, so I was okay with that. I ended up working on a wedding gift that I'm making, so I didn't have to pay that close of attention! : )

Saturday I woke up insanly early. It's just my luck that I can't wake up on days I should, but I wake up really early on days I don't have to. :P Anyways, Steve and I had to go to the post office for stamps and such. I don't like going to the post office. The people behind the counter make me nervous! I was also wearing a t-shirt with the COBRA logo on it (G.I. Joe style) and the guy working there said "OH! Cobra! Where are the Joes?" Note to self, wear shirts without logos next time. : ) When we got home we had to part ways. I had to go to the bank and get groceries, and Steve had a date. The stupid computers were down at the back, so the check I deposited wasn't going to be entered right away. Of course, I had to get groceries regardless, so that was a fun game of "Will my check clear or not!" Luckily, everything went fine. So I got groceries and lunch, and by the time Steve got home I had a headache that wouldn't die. I fell asleep, pretty sure I was in for a massive migrane, but it never got as bad as that. Maybe the nap helped. Josh had called and asked us if we wanted to go to dinner, but my head was still hurting and I didn't want to go anywhere, so we stayed home. For the rest of the evening, I was treated to "Stargate SG1". Whee.

Sunday was church, of course. Then lunch with the family. My mom recently had the cabinets changed so that they no longer hang over the stove. It was weird! It looked totally different, but then I'd been used to the old cabinets for 20 years. Steve and I came home and fell asleep, then he went to church while I stayed home and did homework. Oh yes, it's that time of year again. Gah! I had panicked and thought I was supposed to be writing a whole paper last night, but after checking, I found out I'm just supposed to have proof of research. Of course, then I couldn't find anything on the subject I was looking for. It's enough to make you want to rip out your own eyes! I also got an e-mail from the mom of my friend who had the transplant. Sara had gotten out of the hospital last week, but then had to go back for some small complications. Hopefully she will be out again soon and on the mend. Again. Just remember to keep praying!

So that was my weekend!

Just for Funzies!

I got another fill-it-out thingie.

East Limestone High School... and what I did there.

1. Who WERE your best friends?
-Sara Ultz and Daniel Orr

2. What sports did you play?
-Sports? HAHAHAHA! I was in the band. I didn't even march, I was in the Pit!

3. What kind of car did you drive?
-Red Pontiac Grand Am

4. It's Friday night, where were you?
- Football games in the fall, work the rest of the year.

5. Were you a party animal?
- No. I was never invited to any parties.

6. Were you considered a flirt?
- Oh yeah

7. Ever skip school?
- No, I was a good girl.

8. Were you a nerd?
- More of a geek, I think. I was the "girl who liked star trek."

9. Did you get suspended/expelled?
-No

10. Can you sing the fight song?
- I can hum it. It didn't have any words.

11. Who was your favorite teacher?
- Ronald Harris

12. Favorite class?
- Band/Music or Agribuisness

13. What was your school's full name?
- East Limestone High School

14. School mascot?
- Indian *gasp* how un-PC!

15. Did you go to Prom?
- I went to 4 of them. Three of them I had a date for, the other one my date punked out on me. :P

16. If you could go back and do it over, would you?
- Not just no, but HELL no.

17. What do you remember most about graduation?
- Singing the Alma mater song and being kept on stage by the teachers until it was over, so I didn't get to throw my hat with everyone.

18. Who was your high school sweetheart?
- Hmmmm. I didn't date much, but that would have to be Jason. Maybe Kenny, but he lived in another town so I don't know if he counts.

19. Where were you on senior skip day?
- I spent most of it on the phone trying to hunt down my date to a cook-out because he didn't show up. I was TICKED.

20.Did you have a job your senior year?
- I was a cashier at Winn-Dixie.

21. Where did you go most often for lunch?
- Journalism room. Membership had it's privileges.

22. Have you gained weight since then?
- Indeed I have, but we don't like to mention it.

23. What did you do after graduation?
- Not as much as I wanted to do, that's for sure.

24. When did you graduate?
- 1996

25. Who was your Senior prom date?
- Brian Lindsay (mine), Kevin Whisenant (his)

26. Are you going to your 10 year class reunion?
- Nope. It was canceled.

27. Who was your home room teacher?
- Ms. King, the Spanish teacher. Ole.

I put blackberries in my smoothie this morning and now I've got seeds between my teeth. I don't like it. : P Taste's pretty good, though.

Through the magic of technology, I can now make a smoothie every morning without pulling out the industrial sized blender that I got as a wedding gift! Yay! For Christmas, I got a Target gift card from my sister and I purchased a Magic Bullet blender thingie. It's awesome. You should get one too! Unfortunately, since I didn't buy it online, I didn't get all of the "But Wait, There's More!" stuff. That's okay, though. It would just be more stuff to clean!

I was on time again this morning! Just FYI!

Yesterday I got a call from one of the ladies in a department for which I had recently made some signs. They weren't complicated, but they took me a long time to do because they had to be designed from scratch and mounted differently than I would normally do it. Well, and I should have known they'd do this, they called me and told me that I needed to add an arrow. A stinking arrow, because apparently all of the other signage that points to the different parts of the center couldn't possibly lead them to where they would need to go. Also, I'd need to remove a couple of the items in the BORDER because we don't sell them here. Um, I don't mean to be rude, but it's a border. A picture in which to accent the edges of the sign. It is not meant to be some kind of menu or catalog! So now I have to start over and redo the whole stinking thing. Not only will that take forever, but it will use up more of my supplies than I care to waste on this project! GAH! I wanted to have a Yosemite Sam moment after getting off of the phone with her yesterday. You know, where he stomped around saying intelligible words that sounded like cussing. I didn't, though. I have nothing if not my dignity! Heeheehee.

Rassa, frassin, hobble dashin, beeping, frackin...

Ladies and Gentlemen, behold. I made it to work on time.

GO ME! WOO!

Steve and I have very recently come to realize that our alarm clock is the one to blame, not Steve. Apparently, it will only let you hit "snooze" so many times before it gives up. Now we have our room booby-trapped with alarm clocks, so hopefully this will end our daily lateness.

Also, I was reading an old blog entry of mine and I found my list of happy words. I leave you with one: Pickle Tweezers.

I'm not sure what this says about me, but these martian puppets have never failed to make me laugh. Enjoy!

I have to share this!

While in class today, my professor was talking about Neoclassicism. One of the paintings that we were looking at was based on a Greek legend about a young man who falls in love with his father's young wife and he's dying of longing for her. The teacher was trying to explain that the young man's reaction wasn't rational (well, duh) and based solely on emotions. However, to make his point, he said "So, you've got a thing going for your mom, right? So if that's the case, it's rational to get with your mom!" Of course, he was trying to get us to disagree.

The class down the hall gets out about fifteen minutes earlier than ours and the students were going past our door. About the time he said "So you've got a thing for your mom?" two students passed by and heard him. They looked so funny, and they sort of ran past. Then another two students came by when he said "So it's rational to get with your mom!" and they did the same thing! I was sitting right by the door and I saw all of this. It was hilarious. NOw they probably think Dr. Stewart is a true weirdo. Priceless.

RANDOM ACTS OF BLOGGING

*There is a whole new crop of Camp counselors who have recently been hired. It's a lovely sight to see all of the fresh faced, excited, space-geeky folks who come in every year. Of course, in about 2 weeks 80% of them will have quit because they will find out what kind of children they will have to deal with on a regular basis. Uck. However, I do give them props for attempting it. I'm certainly not that brave. Steve was a camp counselor very briefly before he got smart. The only proof I have of it is his "Certificate of Achievment" that he got by passing the training and a picture of his training group. I think only one person that trained with him still works here.

*Speaking of counselors, there is a guy downstairs who I went to high school with. Either he doesn't recognize me or he's purposfully avoiding me. I can't completely blame him, because he was one of the few people I knew that I didn't like, and I knew he didn't like me. We were in the band together for a while. Sure, I could say hello, but if he's avoiding me on purpose it will be awkward. If he has completely forgotten we knew each other, he'll think I'm crazy. Either way, I don't think I'm going to worry about it. :)

*I got invited to a wedding in France! My friend Paul and his finace, Carine, are getting married in April. Unfortunately, their wedding is going to be during my finals, so I can't go. :( Paul was an exchange student at UAH and he worked at the SpRocket when I was in the museum. Josh and I got to know him pretty well (since Josh is fluent in French and could translate what Paul couldn't say in English.) He came to visit in 2001 and when we picked him up at the airport, we asked what he wanted to do while he was here. The only thing he said for sure was that he wanted to watch the Super Bowl and go to Hooters! I suppose that sort of thing is international! Heeheehee. At any rate, Félicitations, Paul and Carine!

* Have I ever talked about the "Speed Bump Kids" who live on my street? In the last few years, we have had a lot of families with small children move into our neighborhood. Normally I'd be fine with that, but for some reason, the parents of these children feel compelled to let their children play in the street. It would be one thing if we were on a cul-de-sac or on one of those streets where there was never any traffic, but that isn't the case. The children have no clue how to get out of the way when cars are coming, either. In fact, I've gotten dirty looks from the parents who have seen me drive down the street because I apparenetly have no right to drive when their children are playing there. They could, oh, I don't know, tell their kids to get into someone's yard until I pass, but no. So I have to dodge these little kids every time I come home from work. It's been even worse since our street got repaved. They take all of their scooters, bikes, skates, big wheels, etc. and drag them to the foot of our driveway (I'm not kidding) and ride them down the hill. They also apparently don't realize that the big black truck and silver convertable that drive past them every day, need to turn into that driveway, so they stand there IN our driveway until we stop cold. Then the seem to get it. I wouldn't care about this at all if I thought that they had the sense to move when they see a car coming, but I'm scared I'm going to flatten one of them.

* I was sitting in my office yesterday and out of nowhere, I heard a choir start singing "God Bless America" in the museum. Well, actually, it was an Asian children's choir, so it was more like "Gah Bress Amelica". It was cute, and they were really very good. Why was an Asian Children's Choir in our museum singing "God Bless America?" You got me.

*Valentine's day is coming up. I walked into Target last night and was assaulted by hearts and kissy-fase stuff. I realized while walking down those aisles, that I wasn't the least bit tempted by anything there. Can you believe it? I've finally found something that can make me lose my appetite for chocolate! Oh the humanity.

I should really be working, but I haven't quite fully charged this morning. :P Do you ever have those days where it feels like you only have about 5 out of 9 volts running? That is me today. Of course, you aren't here to read about how tired I am. You are here to read my

WEEKEND UPDATE!

Friday was a really long and busy day. I had a lot of signs and things to make, and for some reason I kept forgetting to do things when it was convenient. I'd make a sign, take it to whomever it belonged to, intend to make a stop by someone elses office to get something on my way back, and then wind up back in my office without what I needed. Then it would start all over again! Very frustrating! That night, Steve, Anthony and I had dinner together and then the fellas went to the boat show. I respectfully declined to attend because stuff like that bores me to tears! So I went to Books-A-Million with the intent of getting a coconut mocha latte (because their cafe makes the best ones). It took me forever to find a parking spot, which for the bookstore is unusual, so I expected that I would walk in and find the place crammed to the gills. But I was wrong. It was strange. Not that many people were milling about, and it was really quiet. It wasn't until I made it back to the Arts & Crafts section that I relized where all of the people were. There was some professor or something who taught theology (somewhere, I didn't check) who was giving a lecture about Tolkein and the LOTR trilogy. I stopped and listened for a second, but I have very little knowledge of Tolkein and I've never read the books, so I couldn't get into it. :( Later on, Steve and Anthony came home and Steve had to show off the new TV. All I can remember about it is that it's HD and big, and it uses tiny little mirrors to make the picture. As long as I can figure out how to use it, I'll be good!

Saturday was a very lazy day for me. I did some laundry, swept a little and did some dishes. Other than that, I had given myself the task of mastering a form of 16th century embroidery called "Blackwork". If you've ever seen a portrait of King Henry VIII or his wives, heck pretty much any of the higher classes of that time, you've probably seen blackwork embroidery along the edges of their sleeves. It's pretty, but it will make your eyes cross. I finally figured it out, so I'm glad. It's kind of a pointless skill to have, unless you plan to spend a great deal of time making costumes, but I don't mind. I figure out a use for it! Steve had been gone to the golf course all morning, so when he got back, we watched some Staargate SG-1 dvds. I'm not crazy about the show like he is, but it can be funny. I pretty much just worked on the blackwork stuff.

OH! I did get an e-mail from the mother of my friend who had gotten the transplant. It looks like she's been moved from the hospital, where she has been for the past 13 weeks, to the transplant recovery house! She has had no organ rejection problems since her transplant, but she has been getting sick with viruses, which is normal for people who have had transplants, but she is well enough to begin her down swing on the whole situation! I was really glad to hear that, because I had gotten worried! Anyways, so hopefully she will be able to come home not too far in the future! Yay!

Sunday Steve and I both woke up not feeling well, so we stayed at home all day. That is pretty much it. : )

Well, that was my weekend.

SARAH LEE I AIN'T

Tonight I wanted to break in my new petite fours pan that I got for Christmas. I decided to try and find a low fat cake recipe because, well, my doctor told me on my last visit that I was fat.

I will not discuss that right now.

So!

I found a recipe and had all of the ingredients except for cornstarch, so I just substituted flour in it's place. Apparently that wasn't the best of ideas. Observe:


Don't be deceived, they taste pretty good. They look awful, though! Also, it's hard to get them out of the pan. These are the strangest little cakes I've ever seen!



See, this is why fat free stuff sucks! :P

I got the following e-mail from my sister this morning. It's one of those forwards that is pretty much poking fun at being southern, and normally that irritates me beyond words! It has been a point of mine for a long time to disprove southern stereotypes, mainly because I think that most of them are terribly rude. However, this one was kind of funny because a lot of it is true. Observe:

Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Alabama. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Alabama, plus a couple no one's seen before. (OK, that one is a little silly, we all know that possums don't sleep in the road, they are dead. However, the snake and spider thing is true.)

If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites. (Also true.)
Onced and Twiced are words. (I've heard older people use those words.)
It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy. (Yes! Steve makes fun of me for that one.)
And let us never forget, it's not a garden hose or simply hose, it's a"hosepipe" (one word). (Steve also makes fun of me for that too.)
Knowed is a word too! (Unfortunately)

Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic. (Yes, and they are evil little critters, too.)
People actually grow and eat okra. (BLECH! My mom makes boiled okra. It looks like snot. I'm not kidding.)

Mama-nem means the whole family. (I've used that one.)
Backards and foreards means I know everything about you.

Jeet? is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat yet?" (Sadly, this is also true.)

You know you're from Alabama if:

1. You measure distance in minutes. (We do.)
2. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day. (All of the time.)
3. Stores don't have bags; they have sacks. (Or poke, if you're really old school.)
4. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year. (and usually there is a baby or a dog in there as well.)
5. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixing to go to the store. (Guilty of that.)
6. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal. (Don't forget the Athens Dogwood Festival, too.)
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked. (Not anymore.)
8. You carry jumper cables in your car ... for your OWN car. (Doesn't everyone?)
9. You know what "cow tipping" is. (Actually, this is a misconception. Cows don't sleep standing up, and they will chase you if you try to do this. I will not explain how I know.)
10. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, chili powder, and catsup. No genuine Alabamian ever called it "Catsup". Down here it's "Ketchup" and let's not forget pepper sauce for the turnip greens! (I occasionally will also use cinnamon...so there!)

11. The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require 6 pages..for sports. (The Athens paper uses two pages for news, but the Sports has it's own section.)
12. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday. (My cousins do.)
13. You find 90 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm." (Too warm, but not terrible.)
14. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer,and Christmas. (Sad, but true.)
15. You know whether another Alabamian is from east, west, or middle Alabama as soon as they open their mouth. (And the way they say "Albertville" will also tip you off.)
16. Visiting Wal-Mart is a favorite pastime known as "going to wal-marts." (Went on a date there once.)
17. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather. (Or chicken stew...)
18. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. Example "What kinna coke you want?" (I no longer do this, but my mom still does.)
19. Fried Catfish is the other white meat. (Yum)

So, go ahead and snicker if you aren't from here. If you are, you know what I'm talking about.

Ack. I don't like my new Tuesday/Thursday schedual. I'm only at work for nibbles at a time and I can't get anything constructive done. Eh, well, for that matter, do I ever do anything constructive? : )

Normally I'd do my weekend update here, but I'm not really sure about what I did. I know, that is super sad, but I have the short term memory of a ferret. Of course, I've never done expirements on a ferret to see how their short term memory is, so I could be over estimating myself. I'll do my best to remember, though.

Friday (I think) we went to have our Christmas dinner with our group of friends. Steve and I had already exchanged gifts with Anthony, but we hadn't with anyone else. I got Shannon some books on True Crime and Forensics, because she and I share that passion. We got her husband Greg a Clive Cussler (?) book that looked as long as Gone With the Wind, but I bet he read it all before he went to bed that night! We also got Josh a book written by Mother Theresa (cause he's into Catholic stuff) and a Yiddish Word-a-Day calender (cause he secretly would love to be Jewish). I got some books on the Titanic and a set of books on White Trash Etiquitte, which I will probably use the next time I have "White Trash Bash" at the house. Now I just have to make sure all of my NASCAR china show the same driver, because mixing the teams is a serious faux pas. :) That pretty much wraps up Christmas until next time for everyone except Kenny, but I don't get to see him that often, so I'll just give him his gifts (that he told me not to get him but I did anyways, so nyeah) when I see him next!

Saturday Steve and I went to Sams. I love Sams! However, it's not good to do impulse buying while you're there because you end up with 400 packs of Ramen noodles that you never eat and way too many fish sticks. Stupid me forgot that the checker put one of our things underneath the cart and we drove off without it. It was too late by the time I remembered where it was to go back for it. We were supposed to go out with Matt and Christy, but I got a nasty sinus headache that wouldn't go away, so we punked out on them. I felt bad because she is thisclose to having her baby, literally any day now, and we may not get to hang out with them much for a while. I told her that we would still hang out with them once the baby was born, but she seemed skeptical. Contrary to popular belief, I don't hate babies, I'm just scared I'm going to dent them. She's already told me she wants me to hold it while it's tiny! I don't want to be the reason it has to comb it's hair over a weird, flat place on it's head! Oy.

But I digress...

Steve and I ended up having dinner and watching the next few episodes of Lost. I'm much more confused now than I was before, but we've at least caught up with the actual series. It's going to suck when we have to wait a week between each episode. I just can't believe how great this show is! Also, I love Hurley. It's a love that I can't explain, so I won't try to.

Sunday was our norm. Church, lunch with the family, and then church again. I sang during the sunday night service, and I did alright. I sang "It Is Well" and it was a little hard to do because I haven't sung that since Steve's mom died, and I know she liked that one. They also played that at her funeral. It made Mr. Lee cry, which I didn't mean to do. Sometimes we miss her so much. I was always under the impression that you weren't supposed to like your mother in law, but I did. We had dinner with Mr. Lee after church and then Steve and I made a run to the ghetto Wal-Mart. It seemed very important that I go there and get something, but I couldn't remember what it was once I was there. I hate it when that happens, and it's been happening a lot! I have to stand in the middle of the store and tap my head until I remember, and sometimes I never do! Argh, it is frustrating! I did end up leaving with some stuff, but I still don't know if I got what I needed!

Monday was a paid holiday for everyone I work with, but I had to come in so that I could get paid! I complain, but I don't really mind. I rarely do anything since no one is there to request anything. If someone does request it, I can't get to the printers because the doors are locked and I don't have a key, so I can't make them anyways. So, I amuse myself for eight or nine hours and then go on my way. Not a bad way to spend a day, in all honesty!

Well, that is all for now. I'm about to leave for class, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that A) I stay awake and B) Lap-Top Girl stays far away from me. I also think I've forgotten to do some homework, but I'll jump off that bridge when I get to it I guess.

Hugs and Kisses!
Me

Dear Lap-Top Girl who sat next to me in class today,

You know, I understand that you have a whole system worked out for doing your school work. I also understand that you probably have a million different classes going on and you probably have to run across campus to make it to the class we share close to on time. However, I would like to make a suggestion to you. If you are going to be late, carry 6.2 cubic tons of crap, need to switch from using your lap-top/notebook/loose leaf paper/folder/ eight different pens, AND continuously take your sweater on and off during the course of a class, could you please not sit next to me ever again? Please? About 15 minutes after you arrived, I wanted to take that nice shiny Dell and break your nose with it. There were huge amounts of space where you and your continuously moving ring of stuff could have been, yet you chose to sit in between two students who also had packs and purses, not to mention our own notebooks and the minimum amount of personal space allowed by law. If you didn't notice, we are not in a room with large, comfortable seating that allows each of us to show up to class supplied like a sherpa. We have about two feet of space that we and our belongings can fill without crowding each other.

Also, if you are going to have semi-nude photos of yourself on your lap-top, please (and I'm begging you not just for me, but for all of us in the art department) PLEASE make a special "I'm naked" folder and hide them. Was it not bad enough that your screen pretty much blinded me during class while you changed your desktop wallpaper and surfed the internet? Do I also have to look up to see you in your underwear?

However, I would like to thank you for typing in the dates of the paintings we looked at. Our teacher talks really fast, so it was the only way I could write them down.

Hugs and kisses,
Me

It's official, the crossing guards hate me.

I know I've said this before, but I think they've had another meeting and decided that I'm not allowed to be on time for work under any circumstances and they will do whatever it takes with extreme prejudice. I started back to work on Monday, and I was late. Tuesday...late. Yesterday, super late. Part of it is because of the fact that I have had trouble waking up, but the rest is all about the crossing guards. This morning, I got up and out of the house twenty minutes earlier than I usually do, and I still got to work at the same time as I did yesterday. That can't be normal. This morning they must have known I left early and they recruited a guerrilla soccermom and her maroon minivan to swoop in before me and then drive two miles an hour the whole freaking way to the parkway. Hmmmmm, I'm beginning to sound like a conspiracy theorist. Next thing you know, I'll be wearing a tin foil hat and buying copies of Catcher in the Rye. Oy.

I've learned something about myself the past few days. I love to order packages and track them as they are being shipped. I used to think that I just loved to get stuff in the mail, but now I realize that it's all about the anticipation of them getting here and being able to track them and see where they are stopping and starting. I realize that's probably making some of you sad, but in the immortal words of Garfield the cat... "Simple Cat, Simple Pleasures."

I've got to leave for school in a few minutes. I kind of freaked out tuesday afternoon because I had the feeling that I might have signed up for the wrong class. It isn't totally my fault, though. When Steve moved the desks out of my office, I misplaced the program of study that I was given by my advisor. The POS is basically a road map of what I need to take in order to graduate. Since I couldn't find it when I signed up for classes, I had to just do my best and remember the last two requirements needed. I knew about the 300 level elective, but I couldn't remember about my last art history class. I remembered it had to be something that wasn't ancient, but that was all. Since I chose 19th century art, which was the most contemporary one I saw on the class list, I thought I was okay. However, the teacher said we would be covering art from 1750-1860. So I panicked and wrote every teacher that I had asking if I was in the right class. Now my history prof thinks I'm an idiot because my POS said (he informed me in an e-mail) that my requirement was a post 1800 art history class, and 19th century art was post 1800. Doh! Maybe I should have explained about the lost POS in my original e-mail. I'll be lucky if he doesn't make me wear a helmet and bib during class today. :(

I finally finished up my Christmas shopping yesterday! I know, I know...it's January. I hadn't had a chance to get the last couple of things for some friends before Christmas, so I did it last night. I love getting gifts for people! Hopefully they will like them. If not, they can bite me. :)

Sorry about the lack of posting lately, but I've been having trouble with my internet at work. Not that I think anyone is angry or in any way diminished by my lack of posting, but sometimes it just feels like one needs to apologize. Right?

Well, I won't bother with a weekend update, per se, because for the past week and a half, I've been enjoying a super-sized weekend and quite frankly, I don't remember most of what happened. As I said before, my lay off (loop hole so that the Sprocket doesn't have to give me benefits for working 40 hours a week or so) started the 27th and ended on the 8th. I cleaned, I slept, I took care of some business that needed taking care of. It was lovely. I didn't get as much of the house as clean as I wanted to because I just had too much other stuff going on, but I got the big and potentially dangerous stuff out of the way, so I'm good.

I thought that I'd be spending New Year's Eve alone this time, but Steve surprised me and got home from his trip that afternoon. After a long nap, we watched the two DVDs worth of "Lost" that I hadn't been allowed to see while he was gone, and we watched the tail end of the ball dropping thingie. I had my video camera out, but if you saw the video, it would mostly consist of me showing off my paper cranes and my hand petting the dog. It was low key, but I was glad of that. Sometimes low key is nice. Butler, however, made a party faux pas and stuck his tongue into my glass of sparkling cider. That is just rude, no matter what species you are!

I started my classes today and I think I'll enjoy them, unless something terrible happens. My 19th century art history class has one of the most laid back and soporific-voiced teachers in the whole of UAH. I've had him as a teacher before, so it's not going to have to be much of an ajustment. The only thing I'm going to have to watch out for is his voice putting me to sleep. He looks the part of a history prof, too. Picture baggy chinos, crazy hair, and a Bill Cosby sweater over a plad shirt. He also has a brown corderoy blazer with patches on the elbows. He's almost...almost...a charicature of a professor. He's cool, though. My second class, History of Theater I, is different than other classes I've taken because I'm in there with *GASP* theater people. Not to knock them or anything, but some of them are a bit on the melodramatic side. I've also got Alabama's answer for Kevin Federline in there with me too, but he's really smart. It's funny to hear him talk because he sounds so ineloquent, but he knows so much. My books for that class cost almost as much as a tank of gas! : ) I'm going to love selling those back at the end of the semester.

I have a strange feeling that my history class may not be the one I'm supposed to be in, but I've got an e-mail in to my advisor and hopefully I am wrong. Fingers crossed!

Well, that is all for now!

Yep, still off of work. I'll be back on Monday, so don't be alarmed.

I had to drop my aerobic kick-boxing class for this next semester. :( I wanted to take it, but I realized that leaving work in the middle of the day to take a class that will make me tired and sweaty probably wasn't the best plan. Maybe I'll just take it in the fall...as a regular person instead of a student! Yesssssssssssssss.

OK, well, yesterday I was sitting in my office, wearing my nightgown (or football jersey, if you will) and the doorbell rang. I froze, not altogether sure what to do! Normally I'd answer the door, as would anyone I suppose, but I had a problem. I wasn't wearing any pants. Unlike some people I know, I don't normally just sit around the house sans pants, but it was still early and I hadn't had the chance to take a shower. Anyways, I digress. I didn't know what to do! No one really just drops over, and I couldn't just open the door not wearing any pants (unless it's the neighbor's birthday...) so I decided to be very still and pretend not to be home. Just as I thought that whomever it was had gone away, they knocked on the door. I figured that if someone was going to stand at the door for that long, they must need to see me, so I ran to the other end of the house, threw on my fuzzy robe, and ran to the door. No one was there. At first I thought I had stroked out or something, but then I saw someone at the end of my driveway, and I waved. The lady turned to her friend and got something from him, and then walked back to the door. As she got closer *wince* I realized that she was carrying "The Watchtower" and a bible. Now, I've been with my mom and grandmother when they sent the Jehovah's Witnesses off with fleas in their ears. It always embarrassed me, because hey, they are just doing their thing! Different denomination or not, I don't think it's polite to tell a missionary to kiss off. So I stood there and talked with her a minute, accepted her Watchtower and Awake! booklets and offered her a drink. She didn't accept, but she was very nice. I didn't tell her I was pretty content with being Baptist, but I figure it didn't really matter in the long run. After she left, I had a moment of unreality, though. I didn't know when I woke up that morning that I'd get Jehovah's witnessed to while not wearing any pants.

Now, I have one question about the Jehovah's Witnesses. I did a little wikipedia checking about the religion and I read something that confused me. They believe that only 144,000 people will get to heaven, right? One of their things are going door to door telling other people about Jesus, right? Aren't they shooting themselves in the foot to tell other people about it?

EDIT: OK, I did a little more digging. Apparently 144,000 go to heaven and the rest go to an earthy paradise. I just suppose everyone is jocking for the heaven spots. Inelegant, but accurate as far as I can tell.

I'm going to go ahead and say my little bit about the whole Saddam thing and get it over with.

The whole thing makes me feel really weird.

Here we are, reportedly a country of civilized, (mostly) God fearing people who are cheering about someone being hanged. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about capitol punishment when deserved, and I can think of few people who deserved it as much as Saddam Hussein. He was bad and evil, scary in the same way that Hitler was scary. I also believe he was crazy, probably crazier than most people think. You could just feel that something evil was looking out of his eyes at you.

But I can't seem to be glad that he was executed. I mean, I'm not sorry he's gone. I'm glad that no one has to worry about his brand of crazy anymore and I'm glad that he's not ever going to hurt anyone ever again, but being glad that someone was hanged just feels too creepy to me. I think maybe it makes me sad that things like this have to happen in our world today. That, and so many people seem to have this self-righteous glee about it all. I don't know.

I just don't like hurt. It's hard to explain exactly how I feel about it, though.

I know he deserved it, but I hope no one expects me to cheer about it either.

Gah, I'm probably going to be accused of being a liberal. Of course, if I were glad about it, I'd be accused of being conservative. *shakes head* I'm danged either way!

Ahhhhhhhhhh.

That was me being relaxed.

My yearly temporary firing began this week and I've taken this time to sleep...and sleep, and sleep and sleep. Oh, and clean! My house had literally gotten so messy and dirty that I didn't like walking barefoot. No one's house should ever be that gross, but alas, mine had gotten that bad. With school and work, I had basically told my house to go screw itself, and it did. For the past three days, I have cleaned like a mad woman. Well, like a mad woman who naps a lot. : ) I even got down and scrubbed the bathroom floor. That was pretty disgusting, but at least it's cleaner.

By the way, I hate tile floors. I hate white tile floors even more. Guess what kind of floor my bathroom has?

I've been working on my kitchen/dining room today, and I'm still not done - but I'm close. I mopped and everything. Now I just have to clean off the table, or as Steve and I like to call it, the surface where everything we don't know what to do with goes. I've literally not seen the surface of my table since October. It's like a archaeological dig in there. I'm afraid I'm going to find the Ark of the Covenant in there underneath some old magazines and it'll burn my face off. If you don't hear from me for a few days, call the "Top Men."

Now if you will excuse me, I have to go and unearth another layer of my table!

: )

Grrrrrrr.

Steve Gone + Two new Netflix arrivals which contain the next two disks of season 1 "Lost" sitting there mocking me + Being told not to watch them until Steve gets back = Kelly going crazy.

Why, oh why, did I have to get hooked on another TV show?

2006: A "What Now" Retrospective.

If I were a chicka of few words, I could sum up my thoughts on 2006 in three words:


This Year Sucked.


However, I am not a chicka of few words PLUS I'm sure several of you are probably saying to yourselves, "Wha? She's kidding, right? This year has been so great I've been puking rainbows each month!" Well, for some of you, that may be true. For me, not so much.

Now, before you roll your eyes at me and tell me to get over it, let me just say this: Yes, I know it could be worse. It's not as bad as it could get, and I understand that clearly. In fact, I know even through all of the suckage, that I am blessed beyond what I deserve. So please spare me the lectures on that, because you know what? I already know. You know what else? My year still sucked.

So why did my year suck?

This year I had to deal with the deaths of two very special people in my life. I was actually there when one of them died, and I found out that death isn't peaceful, it isn't beautiful, and no matter how much better off they may be, it doesn't make it any easier to say goodbye.

I've had to watch people I love dearly suffer, and there was nothing I could do to make things better. For someone who always wants to make things better, that is a jagged pill to swallow. Sometimes you just can't do anything, and that kind of helplessness is painful. I've also learned that being the person who always wants to make things better, sometimes makes people think that you don't need help yourself. They think you will be okay, so they don't ask you how you are, or offer sympathy, or give you a shoulder to cry on. Let me be the one to say, that isn't true. Even the most cheerful seeming person still hurts.

I've found out that no matter how much you love someone and do things to make them happy, sometimes they take and never give back. They look at you like you're a vending machine and all they have to do is push a button to get what they want. They never think about who's going to restock it once it's empty.

I've learned that sometimes you have to smile, even when someone is hurting you, because if they find out that you feel anything other than perfect contentment, they will drop you like a hot rock. I've also learned that even though you know this about them, you do it willingly because they are still important to you. In a way, that makes it worse.

I've found out that sometimes I hurt people and don't even realize it. Having an opinion and telling it isn't always the best way to handle a situation.

Sometimes your own brain can confuse you to the point where you think your going crazy.
Sometimes you don't know how to tell people how you feel.
Sometimes people just don't care how you feel, even when they tell you they do, even when they convince themselves that they do. Actions will always speak louder than words.

Sometimes people forget you. Replace you. Don't need you anymore. Ignore you. Sometimes you become invisible, no matter how hard you try not to.

My doctor wouldn't listen to me when I told him I thought something was wrong. I almost drove my car into the side of a building...so I got a second opinion. Three months later I was put on medicine to correct a chemical imbalance that had me convinced that no one would miss me if I were to die.

I've known these things before, but I hadn't had to deal with them all at once until this year. So yeah, my year sucked.

However, there were some good things. Don't get me wrong, every single day wasn't utter crap. In fact, there were periods of time where I was actually happy.

I know this isn't my usual happy-go-lucky kind of post, and I'm sorry. However, I just wanted to vent.

Here's hoping 2007 is better, for me anyway! For all of you who've been puking rainbows, may your year be even better.

Cheers.

Does anyone want a good cry? I sure didn't, but this story didn't care.

That story was found on the al.com blog written by the one, the only, Brian McAlister. Dangit! I didn't want to be all emotional today!

So now, onward to...

THE WEEKEND UPDATE: CHRISTMAS EDITION!

Friday dawned at the same time every day dawns, I guess. However, I didn't wake up on time. Someone, who shall remain nameless (but who's initials are Stephen Pratt) turned off the alarm clock and I was an hour late for work! Actually, that was fine with me, since I knew my boss wasn't going to be there and I could go ahead and take my lunch hour between 8-9. I'll be honest with you, I didn't do much of anything while I was there. This time of year we have so many people out, and no real events to speak of, so I'm kind of in limbo. I did get a call that morning from some people who should really know better than to ask for a large sign at the last minute, but I was able to get it all done. I also learned how to embroider, so it wasn't a complete waste of the day! :)

Saturday I spent the day getting ready for Christmas. I wrapped gifts and finished up some last minute stuff. It was Steve's birthday, so we went to eat dinner with his dad and grandma. We had fun, and I got some video of him opening gifts. We stayed until about 10:00 and then went home to take care of the puppies.

Sunday was kind of strange because we didn't have sunday school, but only the preaching service in the morning. I decided that since I spent a lot of money on a dress and shoes for Steve's corporate party and didn't get to wear it long enough to count, that I would dress up that morning. Everything I had on that day was red. I don't mean red, but RED. Steve has never liked me in red, but he liked it that morning. Then we had lunch with his dad and grandma, and then we went home and slept. It was only supposed to be a nap, but it raged out of control. Christmas Eve was spent back at Mr. Lee's house where we opened our stockings. That was a lot of fun!

Monday I got up late, but it was ok since we didn't have to be at my mom's until lunch. That's the funny thing about my family. You never have a specific time to be there, just "Come in about lunchtime." It never fails! Once Steve and I didn't get to my grandmother's house until noon, because that was "about lunchtime" and we found out everyone had been waiting for about an hour to eat because we weren't there yet. So now, I have to force an actual time out of my mom so that we don't do that again! We packed up Lois with gifts for the family, plus Tommy's birthday cake (which I made, thankyouverymuch) and a rather beautiful poinsetta plant that I got from church, and headed on over to the Martin house. I would have loved to keep the poinsetta, which Mr. Lee had bought in Ms. Rhonda's memory for the alter, but I kill plants. Never on purpose, but I don't have a green thumb and my mom does. I felt that it would have at least a sporting chance to live over there! My sister and her family weren't there yet when we arrived, so we got to eat a little and watch "The Christmas Story" in peace before they arrived. Once everyone got there and had some lunch, we did the gift thing. It was a lot of fun, and apparently the things we got everyone were a hit. My dad REALLY loved his bible on CD and told me he had been wanting one for a long time...so score! Shawn also loved his rolling NASCAR cooler too. Do I know my family or what?! : ) I lied to Steve and told him my parent's weren't going to get him the set of golf clubs he had requested, but they did and he loved them. Now he just has to learn how to play! We all sat down and watched the Pirates of the Carribbean 2 DVD that Logan had gotten and every two minutes someone was asking me what was going to happen. It's the curse of going to see movies when they are new, I guess.
That evening we went back to Mr. Lee's house and had gifts and dinner there as well. All in all, we ate about three hundred days worth of food, but it was good. It was kind of sad with Rhonda gone, and we all missed her, but we still enjoyed ourselves as much as we could under the circumstances. First holidays after someone passes away have their own kind of subtle suck to them though. Luckily it didn't put too much of a pall over the day.

All in all, it was a very nice holiday weekend. I am blessed. : ) I hope your holiday was just as nice and nicer!

More to come...