What Now

And I'm freeeeeeeeee- free fallin'...

I wasn't sure I was going to write about this, but after careful scrutiny of the situation, it WAS kind of funny. So at the expense of my dignity (again) I'll tell you.

When I got to work today, I had a billion things to do. Apparently, missing a day and a half in my job is BAD. So this morning, I was trying to get some things done, and I was in a hurry. Someone had left a big bag of laminated posters in my office, and I wanted to know what to do with them. So I grabbed them and was on my way to take them to my boss and find out what I was supposed to do when I tried to walk through the door to the hallway. I say tried to walk through the door, because the big, stupid bag caught on the doorframe, and I went down like a ton of bricks. I don't know what happened. I can only assume that the laminated posters were so stiff that when they caught on the door, they also caught my leg and tripped me. All I know is that suddenly I was on the floor...and I was in PAIN. Now, in the fraction of a second I was on the floor, several things happened:

1) I had some really embarrassing flashbacks of falling down in the lunchroom/football field/hallway/& Etc. at school and everyone laughing at me. I'm so freakishly clumsy. THIS is why I won't hold babies.

2) I think to myself, "Is my leg broken? I think my leg is broken. So I'm going to have to lay here like a dead roach until someone comes out and checks on me! Wait, no, it's not broken, but it hurts like hell. I wonder if anyone saw me! Oh, how embarrassing! I need to get up!"

3) I realize that I fell right outside of the office of one of my co-workers, and he had a guest. I heard someone say "Oh my God!" and then I hear footsteps.

In that next second, I gather enough of my senses together to get up on one knee (the one I hit when I fell) and pretend that I'm just down there picking up the bag of posters. The guy in the office ran out and looked at me on the floor and asked me if I was okay. Since I couldn't talk, I just kind of whispered/squeaked out that I had just caught my shoe on the door and dropped the posters. Now, I don't know if he believed me or not, but he walked back into the office. I'm going to vote for Not believing me because there were only 7 posters in that bag, and I doubt that they come anywhere close to sounding like a Kelly my size hitting the floor. Anyways, I go in and ask what I needed to do, and limp back to my office. I was so embarrassed. I didn't even notice how bad I hurt my leg until I had been sitting down long enough for the shame to go away. Don't worry, it's all better now, but it's going to take a couple of days for the bruise to my ego to go away. : (

As an off topic note, I just had to kill a spider the size of Steve's head, and in case you don't know my husband...his head is HUGE!!!! I had to flush it out from under the blue chair, which required me to do the "Spider-In-The-House" dance while I looked for a shoe. Then I had to scare the dog while I repeatedly hit the chair with the shoe and move all small objects that the hastered spider could hide behind out of the way. When the spider didn't emerge, I sat back on the couch, knowing that there was no way I could go to sleep knowing something that big and uninvited was in my livingroom. So, I go on a hunt for some kind of bug spray, any kind. All I could find (once again) was the fruit and vegetable pesticide which I sprayed liberally around the doors, under the chair, and around Bear's kennel. I really hope that it doesn't make his fur fall out. Anyways, so I sit back on the couch, eyeing the chair and trying to decide whether it would be worth it to burn it while it's still in the living room, when the giant spider comes running out from under the chair and I grab the shoe and proceed to chase it around until I corner it and kill it. I am the spider killer!!!!! I felt like Bravehart! You can crawl uninvited into my livingroom, but you'll never take MY FREEDOM!