OK, I did a really dumb thing last night. It wasn't supposed to be dumb, it was supposed to be funny, but it turned out to be dumb and now I just have to wait it out!
For the past couple of years, I've wanted to dye my hair a wholly unnatural color. I don't know why, but I do. I realize I've crossed the midpoint of my thirties, and it's really not that appropriate for me to have blue or purple hair, but I thought it would be fun to do, at least once, before I turned 40. I was actually going to do it after Sara's wedding two years ago, but because I'd just started working at the church, I didn't.
I finally talked to the pastor and asked if I DID do something like that, would it be a problem. See, at church, I don't see a whole lot of people who don't know me, and the people who do know me wouldn't think it was weird. Well, they might, but they like me and they'd be OK with it. However, since this IS a church, I didn't want to do anything inappropriate. The pastor said he wasn't going to tell me I couldn't do it, but that I was representing the church when people saw me. Basically, he wouldn't just tell me no, but he didn't want me to. I can understand and respect that, and since having blue hair isn't really something that is vitally important, I don't mind not doing it. We are a kind of old-school, conservative Baptist church and the only blue hair around here belongs to the old ladies, and they have earned it!
Just because I decided I wasn't going to dye my hair, doesn't mean I'm not going to threaten that I'll do it. Honestly, I like to keep our pastor (and youth pastor) on their toes, and the fact that people with strange dye jobs and tattoos are immediately labeled as "strange" by them both, kind of makes me want to get both done just to spite them. I usually just threaten to dye my hair (a tattoo seems a bit extreme for spiteful reasons) and whenever they start annoying me, I throw that out there. They never know if I'd really do it or not, so it's fun for me. I thought I'd just get a wig one day and wear it in, but I refuse to spend $50 on a joke (unless it's a really, really good one.) So, the other day I saw this while at Wal-Mart:
It's supposed to be a very intense, but temporary, colorant for your hair. Of course I bought it, because this was a perfect chance to play a joke on the pastor AND have blue hair, albeit only for a short time. Steve made me promise not to put it in close to a Sunday (buzz kill), so I decided to do it on a Tuesday (last night) which would give me plenty of time to wash it out. The box says it's supposed to coat your hair instead of penetrating it, and I've used (I thought) stuff like this before when I used to color my hair in high school. So blue hair, freaked out pastor,...an all around win! Only, it didn't work out the way I thought it would.
I actually watched some videos of people using it, just to make sure it worked, and everyone seemed pretty happy with it, so I went into the bathroom and started putting it on my hair. It had really strange directions. It said your hair should be dry and untangled (check) and you should section off what you want to color. Then when the stuff was dry, you comb your hair, don't shampoo it and voila! Unfortunately, the stuff is very liquidy and it doesn't have an applicator of any kind, and trying to keep it in one place was impossible, so it got all over my hair. As I waited for it to dry, I noticed a problem. My hair was blue, a dark blue owing to my own dark brown hair, so no problem with the color, but my hair felt like I'd rubbed glue all through it. I mean that literally. My hair was stiff and sticky, and when I went to comb through it, the comb got stuck. Not only that, but my hair was sticking out all over my head. I looked like the bride of Frankenstein, but blue. I tried combing it again, but I couldn't get the comb through it. I managed to get some of it brushed, but the underneath part wouldn't budge. It was like trying to spread a sheet over a bed full of pine cones! I knew that I couldn't go to church like that, and no joke is worth looking like Lady Gaga on a bender, so I washed it out. Actually, I tried to wash it out. A lot of the color came out, but my hair got really sticky. Whatever this stuff is made of must have come from the bowels of hell, because I can't get it to come out! Also, once my hair dried, I saw that it wasn't dark blue anymore, it was gray-blue on top of brown! I still can't properly brush it, because it's still stiff and sticky, and so it's all wild and tangled looking. Steve said I look like someone who was stranded on a deserted island and didn't have a brush. Nice. I honestly don't care what color my hair is, so even though it turned greenish brown this morning when I washed it again, the thing that bothers me the most is that I can't brush my hair. I can't even get my fingers through it! Ugh.
Karma got me before I even got to play the joke. Not cool.
On the bright side, my hair would really look awesome if it was blue. Maybe I'll get it dyed after all. :)