Wednesday, November 30, 2005

You know that cliche about being able to see the light at the end of the tunnel? Well, I'm seeing it! I'm almost done with my paper! I want to do the happy dance, but I won't allow it until I've slapped that sucker into my heavy duty report folder and handed it to the Art Department secretary. Go me, go me, go me!

Now, I have work to do. : )

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Outside it's cold, inside the museum it's chilly, in Algebra class the room was freezing, and up in my office it's about three hundred degrees. I'm going between cold chills and hot flashes so quick, it's like being in an episode of the Golden Girls! Oy!

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by my office being hot. Two out of my four walls are made of glass, and not that double layer, zenon filled stuff either. I basically work in a greenhouse for a good three hours of the day. The rest of the time I'm just trying to cool it off enough not to pass out. I suppose I can look on the bright side, though. If I'm ever strapped for cash, it's the perfect place to start a marajuana growing business! I mean, I can even borrow the Space Camp hydroponics equipment! : )

I didn't finish the Stupid Paper last night, but I came close. I don't know if it's because I've spent so much time reading over it or what, but it's stopped making any sense to me at all, so I've been adding some things and taking other things away. I've been inserting my footnotes and trying to figure out if I still need to put quotes around the stuff if I am indeed making footnotes. I'll have to consult my MLA book on that one. Hastared paper!

Yesterday, poor Butler had an unfortunate turn of events in his kennel. When we picked him up, we forgot to ask if they had fed the dogs, so we fed them that night at the regular time. Apparently, Butler decided he would just be a goldfish and eat everything he could get a hold of, even if he was already full. Well, we put him to bed, and the next morning I walked into the living room to find that he had gotten sick all inside of his kennel. It was dried and disgusting, and we didn't have time to clean it out before we had to leave for work, so Steve moved it outside until we got home. When we got home, I started trying to clean it out, but didn't have much luck with the bucket of water I was pouring into it. So we pulled out the hose from it's winter storage.

Now, I'll pause here to say that for Steve and I, our life is sometimes like a Three Stooges short. We can make the simplest thing complicated and messy, and it's sometimes done in full veiw of people who have no idea what it going on.

Anyway, we pulled out the hose and I set about hooking it up. I couldn't get the stupid thing to attach. Now, I was taught by my shop teacher (yes, I had to take shop in order to be in the FFA, as weird as that may seem now) that anything with screw threads is "righty-tighty, lefty-loosy" and I was doing that. It would still not go on. I didn't have a clue what was wrong, I mean, I have trouble with Velcro, so this confusion didn't seem so far fetched. So I just handed it to Steve who looked it over and realized that part of the last faucet we had the hose attached to was stuck in the screw on end! So he had to pull that out somehow while I stood guard over the disgusting kennel and try not to look at the inside of it. He got it fixed and hooked it up, amd handed it back to me so that he could change out of his work clothes. So I'm trying to hose out the kennel, and it's still not getting clean. I realize I don't have enough pressure, so I turn it up as far as it will go, but it still isn't working! So I ask Steve if he's got one of those attachment thingies, which he did, and asked him to hook it on. Well, if you've ever tried to hook a hose attachment on while the water is on, you probably know what happened. All of the deflected water squirted me in the face. Steve laughed, and I cursed him silently. When we finally got the thing on, the extra pressure inside the hose caused a hole to burst out of one side, which sprayed me again. Once again, Steve laughed, and I cursed him silently. By this time I'm determined to just get the stupid kennel clean. Armed with a broom and a bottle of soap, we fill the kennel with suds and I start scrubbing with the broom! while I'm doing this, water is going everywhere, I'm getting soapy and wet, and I'm loudly asking how Butler could be so inconsiderate as to not promptly wake us up the minute he got sick and let us know about it so that we could clean it out! I mean, if Lassie can tell someone that Timmy was stuck in a well, Butler could have figured out how to unlock the kennel and woken us up! Well, we finally got most of it out. I sent Steve after more soap, and decided (like I'm sure anyone would in my position) that since I've got a hose apraying in four different directions, I'll just pretend I'm a sprinkler. So, sound effects, movements and all, I do this...right as the neighbors drive up. Did I mention I was in the front yard? These are the same neighbors that had the crying child in their front yard not long ago, remember? Well, The hooker next door with an imaginary friend is now holding a water hose in the middle of the front lawn with her arms standing out and twisting from side to side...and Steve is once again nowhere to be seen. So I just continue what I'm doing, kind of hoping they'll just assume it's some kind of pagan water hose ritual and not ask any questions. They didn't ask, but they did run inside with much haste. We finally got the thing cleaned, and I got to go inside and boil my hands and burn my clothes. The next time Butler does something so unspeakable in the kennel, I'm just going to throw it away and get a new one. ;)

Monday, November 28, 2005

So I lied.

Technically the Stupid Paper isn't done, but the rough draft is, so I'm back just breifly for a quick post.

Did you guys have a great Thanksgiving? I did. My dinner was lovely, thank you for asking. You would have been so proud of me! For the first time in 5 years, the smoke alarm didn't even go off once. *happy dance* I was able to do some of the preperation the night before by making my little bundt cakes and decorating them and getting together all of my other ingredients so that I wasn't scrabbling around looking for things. Steve and I spent the morning getting the rest of the house cleaned and doing some laundry, and by the time Rhonda and Lee came over at noon, everything looked nice. I didn't know when they were going to get there, so I didn't have any food to feed them lunch. I felt bad! However, Rhonda still isn't able to eat that much and Steve and Mr. Lee went out to get lunch and would bring me something back. Unfortunately, they went to a buffet, and when they got back, they were full. I was cooking by that time, and they had brought me some lunch, so we hung out until dinner. I ended up making way too much food since Rhonda can only peck, and Steve had gotten a mild case of food posioning from the place they ate lunch, but Mr. Lee and I at least got to enjoy everything. I sent home a ton of the food with Rhonda and Lee, and set about cleaning up. While I was doing that, Steve was watching his recorded episodes of "Prison Break" which is really a very good, albeit far fetched, show. Then we watched a "horror" movie called Spirit Trap, which starred Billie Piper (the newest Dr. Who girl). It wasn't scary at all to me, but Steve hid his eyes. ; ) I ended up throwing away all of our leftovers except for the turkey, so when Steve felt well enough to eat, we didn't have anything left! I felt bad, and he's been ribbing me about that all weekend. Oh well, you snooze, you lose!

We were still going to go to Georgia to spend the rest of the weekend with his family on Friday, so after we dropped off the dogs at the kennel, we drove out there. We have a tradition of listening to the newest Rick & Bubba CD while we go out there every year, but he hadn't bought it yet. We were going to have to go to Wal-Mart and get it. Now, I avoid shopping the day after christmas like the plague. I especially avoid Wal-Mart on this day. I don't like to be shoved out of the way by women in stretchy pink pants, who are willing to rip out my soul for a Holiday Barbie. It's not my idea of a good time! However, I was nicely surprised to find that it wasn't THAT bad. Apparently we had missed the door buster sale earlier that day, thank God. We couldn't find the CD, so we didn't stay long, so we moved on to the Boaz outlet center to see what they had. The Tanger (?) Outlet center out there used to be huge, but most of it has closed down, but there are still two fairly busy sections where the stores haven't been closed down. I knew that it would be busy, but I wasn't expecting what I saw when we got there. It was the shoulder to shoulder, walking in front of moving cars, loaded down with bags, bringing your whole family and herding them around, kind of shopping. I went into one store, and it was a soccermom free-for-all, yanking things off of racks, knocking things over and not picking them up, digging UNDER piles of already searched through clothes and even reaching under the displays in case something got under there...and that was just the GAP outlet. I hate stuff like this. I HATE shopping at this time of year. The monster of consumerism has bitten the general population and turned them into these rude, pushy, irritable, gimmie-gimmie jerks who obviously don't remember why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. I have worked in retail around Christmas, and it was enough for me to want to crawl into a bomb shelter and just wait for it all to me over. I try to get my Christmas shopping over with by the end of September. I always have some little thing I want to get, but it's the only time of year I want to get in and out of a store in the shortest amount of time possible!!!!


We got to Waleska around 6 or 7, I think, and we had dinner with the family. We had a great time laughing and talking and watching the news footage of the people getting stomped on at shopping centers. If you havent seen the footage of the woman who got knocked down, and was so worried about getting her wig back on before she stood back up, that she got trampled. Classic. The next morning, Steve and Greg were supposed to go hunting, and I got settled down to work on the Stupid Paper. I worked on it all day. I took some breaks, but for the most part I was alone, highlighter in hand, trying to formulate a way to finish writing the darned thing. By the time dinner was ready, I was at a stopping point, so I joined everyone else as they ate and watched some college football. I think it was Florida and Florida team had bright orange helmets and the other team was wearing pale blue and yellow. I just cheered when everyone else did. We spent some time after that sitting around waiting for the Georgia & Georgia Tech game to come on, and I ended up grabbing a couple of books and settling back to listen to everyone else do their thing. All in all it was a nice visit, marred only by the Stupid Paper looming over my head.

Well, I'd better get back to work! Duty calls! : )

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Apparently getting a degree in art doesn't mean that you will know how to use velcro. It took a LONG time for me to figure out that the reason the sign wasn't sticking was because I had the hook side of the velcro on both the back of the sign and the sign frame. My professors would be so proud. Not to mention that I'm working in a space museum. Velcro was designed for the space see this mentioned in more than one spot here. If nothing else, I should know how to use velcro!

I'm still not done with my paper. I would honestly rather eat my laptop with no salt than work on it, but if I don't I will still be in college when my grandkids get there. I've just hit kill me mode I think... I'm going to be typing on that #%@^$&*(!!! paper while I'm eating Thanksgiving dinner, I swear. The bad thing is, it's my fault I'm not done, so I can't even blame Steve! Strike that, I'll find a way! : ) Actually, one of my friends made a very valid point. If I took as much time to write my paper as I do to write my blog, I'd be done by now. *ouch!* So after today, I am taking a short sabbatical from the blog and focusing my mental energy (equivelant to a AAA battery at this point) on the Stupid Paper. I've gotten a couple of pages done, but I'll have to go back and add in all of my citations and footnotes later. I can't think when I've got to do all of that at the same time. At any rate, I'm on my way to getting it done, so GO ME! I'll give you the limerick version of my paper, so you'll know what I'm dealing with. I wrote this is math class today:

A usurious man named Enrico,
feared his soul up to heaven would not go.
All his sins tried to bury,
by building a chapel to Mary,
And intrusted its frescos to Giotto.

It saddens me that I have to come up with many, many pages to say what I just said in 5 lines.


Anyways, I'll go ahead and do my weekend update. Well, at least what I remember of it!

Friday started off a lot of fun. I was almost out of gas, so when my car had trouble starting that morning, I just thought that I had better get gas ASAP, so I stopped at the Cheveron near our house to fill up. After I paid, I tried to start my car. Nothing. I tried several more times, wondering what the heck I had done to Rudolph to get this kind of reaction, but still, nothing. The good samaritans next to me, two big dudes who had been jawing about the Iron Bowl, or "Arn Bow" and I've come to think of it, never even looked my way. In fact, when I tried cranking it up for the fifth time, they ran away. Oh well, I suppose that helping people isn't as important as talking about college football. Buttheads.

Anywho, I went inside to let the owners know the reason Rudolph was blocking one of their pumps and the nice Indian gentleman who owns the store offered to give me a jump. Apparently, he didn't have a stake in the game. (Sorry, but I'm a little bitter about that.) Well, we got my truck started, and luckily was next door to a place where you can get your oil changed and other automobile type stuff, and they checked my battery and informed me that I would need a new one. Great. Well, with that taken care of, I got to work about an hour late, and was surprisingly productive! I stayed an hour or so late to get a few loose ends tied up, and then went to Wa-Mart to get food for Thursday. We normally got to GA for Thanksgiving dinner, but since Ms. Rhonda can't travel, I decided that we would have dinner at our house, and I would make it! I mean, the holiday is about families getting together, so I wasn't about to take her only child off somewhere else if she couldn't be there. I'm a little nervous about making a whole dinner. Of course, I've made a Thanksgiving dinner once before, but Josh was helping and it was much more complicated than what I'm doing this year, so I shouldn't worry too much. I just know we are going to have 7 cubic tons of turkey left over, but I was given what I was told was a great recipe for Turkey Salad, so I'm going to make that and use it for leftovers!

Saturday Steve was off with the Fellas, so I used the quiet time to work on my art history stuff and to clean. I think I swept up enough dog har to make four new dogs. Yuck. I can't wait until School is out and I can disinfect the place. I was able to get a lot done to the house, as well as get my class presentation and slide show ready to go. As Forrest Gump says, "That's good. One less thing." Steve called and asked if I wanted to go to see Harry Potter that night, so I was all about that, however, those plans fell through and we ended up going to dinner. Afterwards, Steve took me home so that I could work on the Stupid Paper some more, and he and Josh went out for coffee.

Sunday was church in the morning. Steve caused me to have "laugh in church syndrome" right as service started, so I didn't get to laugh for about 45 minutes! We have a guy who comes to church who is an...eccentric dresser. I mean, he's got some unusual taste to say the least. I'll just say: Pink Zoot Suit. Well, he didn't dress very weirdly that day, but he had his hair spiked straight up on the top and slicked back on the sides, looking for all the world like Vanilla Ice. Both Steve and I saw him come in, and I was about to ask Steve what he thought of the guy's hair, but when I turned around, Steve deadpanned "Word to your mother" without me even mentioning anything. Of course, Service started right then, so I sat there trying to look like I wasn't laughing and making choking noises. Steve does that to me all of the time!!!

Since my mom and dad had plans for lunch, Steve and I went to visit Ms. Rhonda and Mr. Lee. After that was more working on the Stupid Paper, and FINALLY I got a respite to see Harry Potter. I am an utter Potterphile, and the movie was great. I hated that they had to cut so many of the little subplots out, but if they hadn't, I'd probably still be sitting in the theater. I still give it too thumbs up, and another thumb for their choice of the actor who plays Voldemort. I don't know his name, but he played Francis Dolerhyde in the movie Red Dragon, and he is one scary guy. I hope no parents took little kids to this movie. It would cause nightmares for weeks.

Today hasn't been that eventful. I went to school and found that I didn't fail my algebra test, by the sheer grace of God, and I was also given my grades to see what I will need to make on my Final to pass. I think I'll do that now.

In case I don't get to write again for a while, I hope you have a very special Thanksgiving, and that you have plenty of things to be thankful for! I know I do!

Thursday, November 17, 2005

I am officially an idiot.

This morning Steve had to get up early and go to work, so since I was already awake, I got ready and came into work almost an hour earlier than normal. I had to make a vinyl label for the Harry Potter banner (which will be shown in IMAX here at the SpRocket in February along with Batman Begins (movie, not just banner)...just FYI) and I was also going to get organized for going to take my math exam. I had a chance to look over my work, and I got my study sheet together so I could do some last minute cramming once I got to school. In an attempt to be organized, all I grabbed was my study sheet and my purse. In my head it made sense. Not as much to carry, less to worry about. Well, I get to class, and almost immediately realize that when I was being so smart by leaving my backpack behind, I also left my homework behind! There was not enough time to go back and get it, and the teacher will not take it after the class period, so I was boned! The sweet, nice, wonderful girl who sits next to me loaned me some paper and her book, and I got as much done as I could before the teacher came in. It wasn't enough to make a passing grade, but it least I will have something other than a zero. I wrote a note explaining what happened, but I'm pretty sure the teacher won't care one way or the other. I was so irritated with myself that when I got my test paper, I couldn't even concentrate. So I am pretty sure I bombed that test too. In the immortal words of Charlie Brown "ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!"

Nelson The Super Engineer once again explains something I didn't understand. If you look below to my Saturday post, read the comment he left that explains how a CPAP machine works. I had no idea it inflated you! I've got to think of another hard question to ask and see if Nelson can answer it! : )

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

You know, if you have access to Steve today, beg him to sing "Lapti Nek" and do the Star Wars dance!

Well, we went back to NovaCon on Saturday night to get Dirk Bennedict's autograph, and he wasn't there...again. Apparently it just wasn't in the cards for us to meet the Faceman. When we got there, we found his table, but he wasn't there, so we stood around and waited for a while to see if he would come back. I should have figured out that he was gone for good when I didn't see any pictures on the table, but I wasn't thinking. We had been there three times, and hadn't seen him, so I got irritated. I didn't go away completely empty handed, though. I took Dirk Bennedict's coffee mug.

Don't judge me!

On Monday in Art History, we had a very interesting guest speaker. She was talking about, and you'll need to forgive me for not remembering the exact title of her lecture, but she was talking about the interuse of Islamic, Christian, and Jewish artistic styles and images within Medieval Spain. It probably would have been more interesting to me had I not been sitting beside the person I was. She shall remain nameless, but I have known her for years. She is what I think of as being a "Shake-a-snake" Baptist, or in laymans terms, a very, very scary protestant. Now, before anyone gets offended, let me just say that normally I don't have a problem with anyone who is strong in their faith. In fact, I commend their dedication. However, this particular person is of the religious school that immediately and violently rejects the very idea of another kind of belief system if it differs with her own. I don't mean she doesn't want to believe anything else, but I have gotten the feeling that she takes personal offense with the fact that other beliefs exist.

But I digress.

During the lecture, the guest speaker is being very careful not to step on anyone's toes. When it comes to religion, you have to tread lightly, I know this. However, I also know that in a situation (such as art history) where you are going to be faced with ideas different than the ones you have, you have to let some things roll off of your back. If you don't, you will never be able to understand what the image or object is about. Well, the guest speaker goes on to make a statement that could have been seen as anti-Christian. It wasn't, but her choice of wording was unfortunate. I knew this, everyone else in the room knew this, but in the desk next to mine, I feel the girl get tense. I look over at her and she's ramrod straight and staring down at her notes. I can just tell she is using immense restraint not to say something. All I could think of was, please don't do anything, please don't do anything... She didn't, thank goodness. However, I could feel waves of disapproval coming off of her for the rest of the lecture. By the time the lecture ended, I was in the early stages of a plan that would have included me throwing a coat over her head and kicking her legs out from under her if I needed to, but I'm really glad it didn't come to that!


We have this security guard that works at the SpRocket that kinds of scares me. I don't know what it is about him exactly, but he has this "It puts the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose again" quality about him. I'm sure he would be a nice enough guy if I ever got to know him, but he gives me the heebs. He looks a LOT like the guy who played the Green Goblin in the first Spiderman movie.

Stupid rain. I watch all of three shows on TV these days and weather reports have broken in and displaced two of them today! Granted, I suppose I need to know if I'm going to get blown away by a tornado or something, but DARN IT I wanted to see "My Name Is Earl" and "The Office"!

This will mark me as a helpless dork, but we all know my fondness for Napoleon Dynamite, right? Well, I don't normally like all of the cheesy stuff that is marketed out for the movie. You know, like the dolls (oops, sorry Steve, I meant Action Figures), and stuff like that. Well, a couple of months ago, I was at Wal-Mart and I saw this key chain that played sound bites from the movie when you pushed each of the 6 buttons. I bought it. I don't know what posessed me, really, except for the fact that I wanted it to have at work so that I could point it at my co-workers and press the "freakin' idiot" button. Well, I kept it in the pocket of my lab coat/utility jacket and it kept falling out of my pocket, so I put it in my purse, and completely forgot about it. Well, the other day I went to class, and I was rummaging for a piece of gum in my purse when all of a sudden, my purse says "Freakin' Idiot". Well, it not only scared me a little (because when my purse talks, it ususally doesn't sound like John Header) but the girl in front of me looked around at me with a confused look on her face. I was embarrassed about owning such a childish thing, so I started looking around like I didn't know what it was either. I felt so stupid, but I wasn't about to admit that it was indeed my purse quoting Napoleon Dynamite.

Do you believe in karma? Well, I actually hate to call it karma because I don't so much believe of it in that sense, but I do know that there is something out there that comes back and bites you right in the behind when you've done something bad. And before you ask, no, this isn't from watching too much "My Name Is Earl". The thing is, I think it's happening to me right now, whatever this thing is, because of something I did to someone years ago. It wasn't something that I meant to do, but I'm afraid I might have really hurt someone once and now it's coming back on me. It's a bad feeling to know there is nothing that can be done but just deal with it. Anyone got any good anti-karma ideas?

Saturday, November 12, 2005

For all of you who followed my link yesterday, you know that Steve and I celebrated our fifth anniversary (and wasn't my mini website about it cute? *gag*!

He already had the day off because of Veteran's Day, so I also took the day off so that we could actually spend time together for the first time in a few months! We got to sleep blessedly late (7:00 or so for me) and we had a day planned of things to do. First we had to go to the Sleep Clinic where Steve found out the test results from his sleep study. Happily, he doesn't have sleep apnea (so no Darth Vadar mask, thank goodness) but they are going to do a couple of other tests later to rule out other stuff. We left there and got lunch, and then we went on to what we had planned our day around: NovaCon, the sci-fi convention they are holding in Huntsville this weekend. *pause for a few moments to marvel at our geekiness* It was only a little after noon by this point, so we got in and everything was still being set up. It wasn't big at all, but we had kind of expected that since it was the first year they were having it and everything. We went ahead and got weekend passes so we could come and go as we pleased, and we saw everything there was to see in about 15 minutes. Now, as I said, it wasn't supposed to be this huge thing like DragonCon, but to be able to see EVERYTHING in 15 minutes was not something we had planned on. We were actually hoping that the sci-fi celebrities who were scheduled to be there would have already set up, but they hadn't arrived there. We were specifically looking for Dirk Bennedict (The Face Man from the A-Team and the original StarBuck from Battlestar Galactica) so we could have our anniversary picture made with him. It was apparently still too early for him, so we kind of stood there for a few minutes while this guy in a Star Trek Voyager uniform told us -for the second time that day- to take a free copy of their newsletter, or sign up to become a member of their "crew". We decided that we would come back out on our way to dinner in hopes that everything was set up and ready by then.

We left and went shopping for our anniversary gift, year 5 is apparently wood, so we went to the unfinished furniture store, but didn't find anything. We eventually went home and after a while we got ready for dinner. Steve had gotten us reservations at this place in Madison that I we had heard all kinds of wonderful stuff about, and it's one of those places where you need to dress up, so Steve got all handsome and I did my best to look nice. I realized something while I was getting ready that sort of surprised me. As much as I like to get dressed up and go out and do fancy stuff, it had been almost a year since I'd had the chance! We've been so busy that we haven't done anything like that in a while, and not only that, but when I was dressed and everything, I didn't feel like myself. I felt like I was wearing too much makeup and that my skirt was too short. I mean, I know I didn't look bad, but it was something I wasn't used to anymore. It was weird! Anyways, so we finally get ready, take our commemorative anniversary snapshot, and walk out the door. Almost immediately, we hear this kid, somewhere outside, absolutely freaking out. At first I thought someone was getting switched, but we both stopped and realized this poor kid had apparently screamed herself hoarse yelling "Moooooommie, Moooooommie!" and she sounded scared. We had not been able to hear her from inside, so it kind of rattled us a little. We both stopped and kind of looked towards each other like, What should we do? Should we go over there? We listened to her freaking out for a few minutes (yeah, we'd make super parents, huh) trying to figure out what was going on. ***I suppose I should tell you that we have never met the neighbors who live there. We all have such strange hours, plus the fact that we aren't exactly the "take-the-new-neighbors-a-batch-of-cookies-and-introduce-ourselves" kind of couple, so we have never really crossed paths. I know that they have two kids, a boy and a girl, who I see walking to school, and I know they have that crazy dog that I've named Cleatus, but that's all.*** About that time, my imagination goes into overtime and I'm seeing this little girl standing over her mom's lifeless body for one reason or another, so I decide I'm going over to see what's wrong. I am in spiky high heels trying to walk through the yard (which with as clumsy as I am, could have been a broken ankle waiting to happen) and I amazingly make it to the next yard without falling, and I see this little girl of about 3 or 4 just standing there calling for her mom, and completely alone. So I reach inside myself and try to find some tiny scrap of maternal...whatever, and I start saying stuff like "Sweetie (because that's what you call crying kids, I guess) are you okay? What's wrong" and so forth. This little girl looks me up and down, and goes off on another gale of "Moooooomie!" So I look around, and don't see anything amiss other than this little girl alone outside. I looked at the house and realized someone was home, but no real idea ever came to me as to why a toddler was outside at night alone. So I turn back to the little girl, and I tell her we'll go knock on the door. She is still freaking out, but she walks with me to the front door. I looked at the door and realized the handle was broken, so she was probably just locked out, so I tell her I'll ring the doorbell, which I found out is also broken. So I just start banging on the front window. At this point I am close to panic myself because what in the world would I do with this child if this wasn't even her house, or if her parents were punishing her by making her stay outside, or dozens of other equally unsavory things. I see a woman sort of peek around the corner and come to the door. When she opened it, she had this surprised look on her face and she kind of looked me over. I could only read this look as "well, okay, there is a hooker on my front porch with a little girl! How odd!" The little girl runs inside to another lady (a visitor to our neighbors) who had walked into the room and I explain that we found her outside and she seemed to be scared and was crying. The mom of the little girl looked horrified. I kept trying to explain that "we" just wanted to make sure everything was alright, and that "we" didn't know if anyone was home and "we" blah, blah, blah. The moms then explain that they thought she was with the other kids, they surmised that the kids must not have let her into the back gate, and they both kind of had that slightly desperate "please don't call DHR" look on their faces. My neighbor smiled at me and asked where I lived, and I turned and pointed next door, only then relizing that Steve was still on our stoop and not next to me. He was afraid he'd scare the little girl more than she already was, so he'd stayed behind. While I had been talking and saying "We", they didn't see anyone. So now I'm the hooker who lives next door with an imaginary friend. She introduced herself and I did the same and we said goodbye. It was...uncomfortable. Hopefully next time we speak, there will not be a terrified, crying little girl involved!

Anyway, so we head back towards Madison, stopping again at Novacon, which only had about 4 more people there than when we had been there before, and no Dirk Bennedict. We severly stood out in this crowd, if you can believe it. I mean, there were fairies and Jedi and other manner of thingies, but we were dressed up very nicely. We wondered around a little more and left again. We had some time to kill before our reservation, so we went to CompUSA to look at some stuff, and we also had gone to Target and got our anniversary gift of some wooden television trays. Steve also bought me some color changing rubber duckies, they light up and change color so I was fascinated, and some shoes to switch with the ones I was wearing because I have indeed lost the talent of wearing spiky heeled shoes. We finally made it over to the resturaunt, and we had a great dinner. After that it was kind of late, so we came home, watched part of a movie and went to sleep.

Oh yeah, I almost for got to add this. While we were getting ready, Steve walked into the room with me and said "Today has been a good day" and I thought Awwwwwww, he's about to say something sweet! But then he finished what he was saying "I didn't even have to use my A.K." which I think is a part of a Snoop Dogg song or something. SIGH, oh well.

Good times...noodle salad. : )

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Guess what happened about 5 years ago...

Today I went to my lithography class completely unprepared for the critique, but lucky enough that the teacher got too busy doing a demo to actually have it. He told everyone who had already pinned their stuff on the wall to just leave it, so during our break, a few of us sat back and talked about what was up there. There was one particular project that was made up of two sheets of paper. The print was the same on each page, but the paper was different. One sheet had the word "proprtions" on it and the other page had silhouettes of sky scrapers on it. That alone should have told me something. I looked again and saw that the picture was an actual print, like, he actually put printing medium on his body and stamped an image of a hand, a ear...and....what was the other thing? Apparently the guy made a print of his, um, naughty bits.


It was bad enough to have to draw naked people, but at least you were prepared for it because the teacher warned you about it in the syllabus, but this... I don't care who you are, nothing prepares you for THAT! If that wasn't bad enough, when we were leaving, the guy I was walking out with stops right by the door, blocking my escape, and begins pointing out details on the print, which was pinned by the door. I was so embarrassed...what could I say? ", that's nice. Lots of...details...and stuff..." He finally let me out, and then proceeded to talk about it in the elevator as we leave. So I'm trapped in a tiny little room with a guy who is apparently obsessed with...naughty bits...who is talking about them as other people get in and out of the elevator. I tell you, that was the most uncomfortable elevator ride of my life.


Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Got a call from Steve today at about 2:00 giving me an update on his mom's surgery. Apparently when the doctors went in, they began the "whipple procedure" and in the process they found a new tumor, but this time it's cancerous. I don't know specifics, but I do know that they found it early, and so far it hasn't spread to any organs, but is localized in the lymph nodes near the liver. They didn't take it out during the surgery because the doc was afraid they wouldn't get all of it, so they did a mini-whipple (my word, not theirs) and got her closed up. They are going to give her some time for recovery from the surgery, and then start a two week stint of chemotherapy, and hopefully that will stop the growth of the tumor and they will finish whippling her later and also take out the tumor at the same time. I would just like to ask for more prayers, please, because this is a really scary thing.


Monday, November 07, 2005

WHERE DID FALL GO?! No, that's not a title, that's me screaming out of the window at the weather! I don't want to be hot anymore (well, temperature wise anyways, I don't really have a choice with the other kind. Heehee)!! I have sweaters I want to wear, a great coat, and boots! If this happens again, I'm moving north, I swear it. I want snow or something! /frustration

I had a very lovely weekend, if I do say so. Friday night after work, I went shopping for some work clothes. I've gotten to an awkward place with my weight where just about everything I own is either too big or too small. I had some kind of coupon for New York & Co. and I needed to use it before it expired anyway, so I went to the foo-foo Parkway Place mall. I will just say that, it doesn't seem to matter what it feels like outside, but that place will crank the heat up to a degree past unbearable. "Hey, it's November. It's supposed to be cold. What? It isn't? Eh, who cares, let's go ahead and set the thermostat to 'High Noon at the Equater.'" I don't think any building north of hell should feel like that place did on Friday night. I guess that since the Christmas decorations were already up (huh?) the mall owners didn't feel air conditioning was festive. Oh well, anyways, I went down to NY&CO. and couldn't find anything that jumped out at me, so I decided to see what else was out there. I was just about to give up finding anything, when the GAP called to me across the building. I don't normally enjoy going into the GAP for the simple reason that the clothes there make me feel...old. I will buy jeans there, but that's because jeans are pretty much ageless, everything else just screams "JUNIOR HIGH!!!" at me. Anyways, I took a turn through the store and saw a sale section that gave me pause. I found a pair of corduroy khaki colored pants and a pair of jeans in a wash that I can never find in my size. Now, rationally I knew that I should try them on before I bought them, but I didn't want to be in the mall of Hades any longer than necessary. So I snagged them, finally found a shirt I liked in NY&Co and went home. After Steve and I had dinner, I decided to do my ritual of trying on the new clothes. I tried on the corduroy pants: Score! They fit, but I have the feeling they might be the kind of stuff that will shrink easily, so I'll need to be careful when I wash them. So I grab the jeans and read the tag, they are in my size and they say "curvy" on them. I thought, "Hey, that's good, I have curves! Heck, I've got sine waves! These should fit fine." and I promptly ripped the tags off. I pulled them on and relize they aren't pulling up as far as they should. My first thought was...well, it was something I can't type in here because people from my church and my mother-in-law read this, so I take a look in the mirror and see that they fit everywhere else, so why aren't they....Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! I had grabbed a pair of those pants that only come up as far as your hips. The ones I make fun of all of the time! The ones that are perilously close to being chaps! Oy! I had already torn the tags off! I wouldn't ever find the wash in my size again! I debated with myself for a while before I decided that these would be my "long shirt" jeans. As long as no one sees the top of them, they won't have to wonder why I'm trying to channel Britney Spears. I figure that their only clue will be my constant pulling on them to make sure they are still up!

Saturday was almost productive...almost. Steve and I decided to give the lawn the last mow of the season (hopefully), so I jumped on the riding mower and got into "lawnmower zen" mode. Everything was lovely and peaceful, well as peaceful as one can be on a lawnmower, until I ended up on the east side of the lawn next to the new neighbor's house. Their mongrel dog, whom I've names Cleatus until I know his real name, ran up and started barking at me like no one's business. I was making faces at him, since he couldn't get at me through the fence, so I didn't happen to notice that their walnut tree had dropped a significant amount of golf ball sized undried walnuts into the grass. It wasn't until I heard *Boom! Crack! Pow! Fling!* that I relized that walnuts are shooting out from under the lawnmower like baseballs out of a pitching machine. All I could do was cover my mouth and hope that they never notice the dent in the side of their van. I was horrified. I finished as quickly as I could so that Steve and I could go to run some errands, and while I was getting cleaned up I suddenly got the icepick in the back of my head again. Another migrane. I pop some Excedrine and put on my brave face, and we went on. Steve needed a haircut, so we go back to Parkway Place Mall. I didn't want to sit in the salon, so I staggered around the museum trying not to walk into doors or look directly into any bright lights. I ended up going into Spencer Gifts and quickly remembered why I hate that place. I can't believe I used to think that store was funny. Ick. Anyways, after we left the mall, we got the truck washed and went to Target to pick up a couple of prescriptions and went home. We were supposed to go see a movie with Shannon and Greg, so I took a nap to see if it would help my head, and happily enough, it did! Yay! So we went to dinner and out to see Chicken Little. I wasn't execting much from the movie, but it was actually really funny. A whole lot of Speilberg references, a couple of Star Wars references for the Steve, and what I think were homosexual innuendos thrown at a pig, but I'm not really sure about that. All in all, it was a good little movie, two thumbs up, a fine family film. : )

Sunday we went to church in the morning, and we had a lunch date with some friends after that. They are a married couple who go to church with us, and they are trying to have a baby. You know, I really didn't need to know that, but I suppose if they need to talk about it, I'll listen. Part of the way during lunch, Husband looks up at me and says "So, are you and Steve going to have kids anytime soon?" I was in the middle of chewing a burrito so I couldn't react in my usual manner of screaming and hiding under the chair, so I just kind of stammered that we hoped to wait a while. I hate it when people ask that! It's such a private thing! Anyways, he said "You guys should go ahead so that you and Wife and be pregnant at the same time!" He said this as if he was suggesting we get matching purses or something. I just kind of laughed nervously and said "You guys are wanting them now, and that's a little soon for me." Then I changed the subject. I'm going to have to start carrying around one of those air horns so that when people ask me that question, I'll just blast them with it. I'll think of it as aversion therapy. Even if we were thinking about it, I don't want to talk about it with's just too...none of anyone's business! I say this now, of course. I'll probably be the worst one about it later on. *shudder*

Oh yeah, I have two new entries to make in my Chocolate Nightmare Scale.

Whoppers: I only ate two of them. I give them a 5 on the nummy scale. I can't remember exactly what I dreamed, but I woke up perched on the end of the bed like a gargoyle telling Steve "Don't move...just don't move." as I pull the light chain on the fan to turn it on. He asked what was wrong, and I said "Spiders. I've got to see if their are any spiders." Then I flipped off the light and went back to sleep. Nice way to freak out the spouse, no? : )

Choxie Truffles: Depending on the middle, I give them a 7-9 on the nummy scale. I think I might have to put these on the same scale as Godiva as far as nightmares go. BAAAAAAAAADDDDDD Dreams!! I dreamed we had been invaded by aliens who picked about a dozen earthings to be on a televised reality show that I like to think of as "Survivor: Earth". I don't remember a whole lot of details, but I know that the rules of the game were that we had to give up everything that we held dear to us, which included family, friends, jobs, everything. We were also not allowed to eat or drink for the duration of the show, which was one of the ways we were eliminated, by getting sick or dying that way. We were given a task to perform every day, and we had to complete it or...we were "let go". If we broke any rules, they would destroy the earth. Granted, it sounds like a bad lucas film, but it was pretty creepy. I kept getting more and more thirsty, and they wouldn't let me drink anything, and it was making me sick. I actually woke up sick to my stomach and so thirsty that it hurt to swallow. After being awake for a while, that passed, but it was so real!

As an end not, I'd like to ask for some prayers for my Mother-In-Law. She is going to Birmingham tonight because she is having surgery tomorrow morning at 8:00 am. We've been told that her surgery is routine, but she will have a long and not so plesant recovery time ahead of her. Please just keep her in your prayers if you don't mind. I'm sure she'd appreciate it.

Wow, that was a LONG post!

Friday, November 04, 2005

I just saw the weirdest commercial for some kind of diabetes medicine. You know how they run down the list of possible side effects on these drug commercials? Well, one of the side effects was "makes you more susceptible to pregnancy".


The first thing I though was: I hope no one who has to come into contact with Kevin Federline has to take that medicine. I think you could get pregnant just bumping into him in the street! Heck, I think that's possible even without the medicine!
Well, it's been another productive day here at the SpRocket Center. /sarcasm

Actually, it seem like the more productive I need to be, the less I get done. This morning I had to come in and finish laminating some photos for our Human Rescources department. We have a laminating machine, but it doesn't work, so I was doing it old school with contact paper. I can honestly say, I am not good at laminating stuff. My sleeves kept getting stuck in the adhesive. I now know what it feels like to be a fly. Actually, I knew what that felt like already. When I was younger, a rather nasty little boy threw flypaper at me and it stuck to my head. Flypaper + Hair = OUCH!!!!!!! The whole laminating thing just brings back bad memories!

At the moment, I'm trying to cut out a Space Camp® logo on the plotter, but I've already had to redo it once. It would be easier if it didn't have all of these little tiny bits to it. I'll probably go home with half a space shuttle stuck to my butt or something. I always go home with something stuck to me from up here. : )

Last night Steve brought home a baby gift for a lady he works with, and I was given the task of wrapping it. A lot of people assume that I am good at wrapping gifts because of all of the art stuff I do, but I'm not. I can never figure out how much paper to cut off, so I always have these flappy, hangy pieces on the end that I have to cut off, and then they get raggedy and I have to employ some rather creative origami to tuck everything where it needs to go. Not to mention, I NEVER have the appropriate kinds of wrapping paper in the house, and I can never find any bows! I once had to wrap a baby shower gift in leopard print paper with a black bow. It looked like I was giving the mom-to-be trashy lingerie! For a couple of years after Steve and I were married, I had all of the wedding bows to use, but that well has run dry. This time I thought I had something a little more approprite, some purple plaid paper I had bought from some sad eyed kid for a school fundraiser. I did have it, but only about three feet, and it wasn't enough, so I scratched around until I found an unopened roll of brown paper with dragonflies on it. Now, maybe it's just me, but flying insects don't just scream "BABY" to me, but it was either dragonflies or some shiny blue paper that said "Happy Birthday" all over it. I decided to go with the bugs. Then I had to find a card to match. Thank God I have one of those desktop publishing software suites, because lo and behold, I found a dragonfly card in the baby section! We had a whole "bug" theme going on. It may not have been appropriate, but darn it, at least it matched!

I love those card programs. They have a card for everything! Birthdays, holidays, sympathy, caught-your-husband-trying-on-your-majorette-uniform...everything!

Well, I'm off to begin my weekend! Woo-Hoo! I hope you have a great one too. : )

Wednesday, November 02, 2005


I spent a great deal of my day taking pictures of trees. I used to have a friend who did this for me, but he apparently has a life now, so I have to do it for myself. I've actually been wanting to take a few pictures of the gorgeous maples in the parking lot of the museum, so I snagged the camera as I was walking out of the door today. I'm glad I had it with me, because look at what was in my front yard:

When I got to work, I was glad to see that the leaves were still there. I was certain that with my luck I would finally remember the camera, and every single tree would be completely naked. I wish I could show you all of the ones I took, but I liked this one the best.


I never got a chance to do my weekend update, but I'll go ahead and give you the Reader's Digest Condensed Version, just so that I don't feel like a complete slacker.

Friday Steve and I went to dinner at the Bonefish Grille. I was a little underwhelmed at the food, but I liked the atmosphere. I'm not a huge fan of seafood anyway, but I didn't want to order anything else at a seafood place. I give it a 5 on the nummy scale, but that's only due to the calamari we had to start with and the waiter who was a lot like Paul Reiser without all of the touching of the forehead and Jewish Mother attitude.

Saturday Steve's dad came over to help him figure out why our heater wasn't working. We had been freezing inside for about a week. Steve couldn't figure out why the fan was coming on, but no heat was coming out. I mean, we had to start putting a heating pad under the covers for a while before it wasn't painful to get into bed, and it got to the point where I was wearing gloves inside while I was doing my homework. Not a nice feeling. Anyway, Mr. Lee was here for a grand total of about 7 1/2 minutes before they realized that there was no heat because the gas valve was turned off. I won't make fun, even though I want to -- badly. I'll just say that...*cough*iwouldhavecheckedthatfirst. At any rate, we now have heat, but with oil prices as high as they are, we won't get to use much. That night we had been invited out to dinner with friends, but once again I had to do more stinking research for that stupid research paper. There isn't a curse word in any language strong enough to describe how I feel about that paper.

Sunday I finally got to sing again. I had finally found an arrangement of His Eye Is On the Sparrow that I liked, so I sang that one. Steve and I got to church so early that I practiced before the Minister of Music came in, and my voice (which is still kind of creaky at times) was fine until he walked in, and then I started coughing like crazy. I'm sure he was glad he asked me to sing! Well, even though I was nervous, I did all right. At least I didn't spend the whole chorus coughing like I did at practice! That afternoon we went to my parent's house and celebrated my dad's birthday. Everyone bought him clothes because he's recently lost a LOT of weight, and my mom said that he looked pitiful trying to wear his big clothes to church. We made him try everything on for us and model, so I'm sure he loved that. : ) That night we were going to have a pastor appreciation reception, so I and the rest of the Hostess Committee were down in the basement making sandwhiches like mad fools. We have one little old lady who's got to be in her 70s or 80s and she is a sandwhich making MACHINE. May I be able to handle cold cuts like that when I'm her age! ; )

Tuesday, November 01, 2005


We all know that I drive a massive, gas swilling, screw-the-environment SUV named Rudolph. We drive to work and school every day, just trying to get from point A to point B without hurting anyone. I try as hard as I can to be a curteous driver because I know how much I hate it when people are reckless and do stupid things that put both Rudolph and I in danger. This is soon going to change. If I see one more person, ONE MORE, on a cell phone not watching the road, not having a hand free to reach over and turn on their stupid blinker, I am going to become a vigilante and run them over. I'm not just talking about a cursory bump on the fender, I am going to go full on, monster truck rally on someone.



Tonight I stopped at Target on my way back from school. As I am getting back into my car, I notice one of those huge, Doo-lee (don't have a clue how to spell that one) Bubba Trucks parked in the row behind me. I didn't think much of it, after all, I live in Alabama. My high school parking lot was 1/4 Bubba Trucks. I went to the prom in one for the love of Pete. We co-exist peacefully...or at least we used to. As I'm backing out, the Bubba who owned the truck in question was putting his purchases away, and I notice that he's watching me back up. Now, as you can see by the picture above, Rudolph isn't that small, but I've never had trouble manuvering it. However, as I'm backing up, I realize I'm going to come a little too close to the Bubba Truck. I'm cool, though, because I knew I wasn't going to hit it, I was just going to have to pull up and back up again. As I pull forward, I realize that the car in front of me is too close to pull up very far, so I start backing up again. If you've ever seen that scene in Austin Powers where he's in the little golf cart trying to get out of Dr. Evil's underground lair, you'll know the position I was in. So I try backing up a little further, and I see the owner of the truck do the "Are you stupid or something" face at me because of how close I came to the truck. Luckily I was able to just barely miss him and be on my way. I'd like to send a message to Bubba, if I may. If you are going to drive that moving Freudian cliche, please don't BACK into a parking lot only halfway or maybe you could start parking in the "Big Car, Small Manhood" parking spaces they have out back so that regular people can move about freely.


Halloween was kind of boring this year. I was going to dress up for work, but I couldn't find all of the pieces of my costume. Don't worry, I wasn't going to be annoying with dressing up. I mean, let's face it, I throw on an orange turtleneck and I'm Velma from Scooby-Doo. border="0" />

However, since I had given a lot of clothes to a yard sale, my skirt was gone, and apparently there isn't a red skirt in north Alabama to be had for love or money. Oh well. I had to stay at work so that I could set up my new(ish) computer, so I didn't get home until after 8, and there were no Trick or Treaters anywhere to be seen. I'm kind of two minded about this: A) I bought candy and had it all parceled out in little bags and everything for anyone who came by, so that was a waste of my time. However, B) I bought Junior Mints...and I LOVE Junior Mints, so who cares. I really don't need to buy candy I like to eat for Halloween, because quite honestly, I ate most of it before the 31st anyways. That's why I ended up putting the candy in little bags, to fill in the dwindled numbers of Junior Mints with DumDum suckers, and so that it would be more work to get at them by having to remove them from a little bag.