MORE RANDOM ACTS OF BLOGGING

1) I had the weirdest experience the other day.

So I get a call. It was someone I don't usually chat with, but I figure they must need something so I hung in there. We're doing the small talk bit and then right in the middle of the conversation they just start being very clipped and short with me. One word answers, the verbal equivalents of shrugs, and stuff like that. I didn't notice at first, but the longer we talked, the more obvious it became. I was doing my level best to keep the conversation going, because I thought, well, if they needed something they'll tell me soon, but they never did. It was so weird!

I came within an inch of apologizing for calling them if they were busy, but then I remembered I wasn't the one who called in the first place. That's just how weird it was. Eventually we were sort of sitting there, not talking, and then they abruptly ended the call. I basically sat there like WTF? I didn't call them back because it was confusing.

I know I'm not the most interesting person in the world, but to my knowledge, I've never bored anyone to the point of regretting calling me. I still wonder if they needed something. I hope that they weren't calling because something was wrong and I just didn't catch on. I'm not going to ask, though, because the whole thing freaked me out. If they need something from me, I'll find out when the stay-at-home stuff is over and I see them again.

2) Josh was in town this week! The reason he was here sucked, because his step-father passed away and he was here to help his mother with details, but we have gotten to see him.

He went with us on our weekly hike last Saturday and we got to have dinner with him last night. Some of the restaurants have opened up for dine-in, and so we went to one and sat outside. Don't yell at me, ok! We were the only ones out there, and we were sitting at one of those tables with fire in the middle, so we were both socially isolated and were talking over fire, so I hope that was enough. I'm still not crazy about the idea of going out just yet, but it was Josh, ya know? I miss him and who knows when we'll see him again. 

Besides, he really needed a break from all of the death stuff. Some people want to be left alone when they are grieving, some people fuck their way through it, and some people need company. Josh needed company.

I'll miss him when he leaves.

3) Do you think we'll all be OK after the bulk of the quarantine stuff is over?  Mentally, I mean.

I know that sounds like a dumb question, but I really do wonder if we will be.  I know that there are a lot of people out there who have lost jobs, and have lost loved ones and all of that, and it's obvious they will not be the same, but I'm specifically wondering about the rest of us.

Sometimes I think I'm not OK. I can't really pin-point why I feel like that, but there are times when it sneaks up on me. However, I find myself pushing it all off and thinking that I don't have time for that and I'll think of it when stuff gets back to normal. Like, when office hours are back to normal I can take a moment to be depressed or sad or whatever it is I'm feeling. Is that weird?

Maybe it's just stress of trying to keep things as normal as possible during a time when things are decidedly not normal. I mean, the fact that I feel like I have to justify comforting a friend who lost a loved one is not normal at all.

I'm just tired, y'all. I'm tired and stressed and I'll be glad when some things get back to normal, but I'm also going to miss the slower pace of life. I don't know. Nothing makes much sense.

Is it weird that I want to quit my jobs and run away to a cabin in the woods for a year or so? Haha!

Ugh, sorry. I know you people don't like feelings. I didn't mean to have one. 

I'll be ok, I know. I just hope it happens soon!