1) The funeral went well, thank you for asking. I managed to get the service in order and everything went smoothly as far as I could tell. Doing A/V for a funeral is as nerve wracking as it is doing it for someone's wedding, because if you play the wrong song, or a video doesn't play at the right time, you can't just say "Hey, hold up! Gimme a second!" Luckily, that didn't happen!
During the song I was concerned about, I took a ball point pen and stabbed myself in the leg with it, so I managed to not cry as much as I might have. It's not a bad trick, but my leg hurt for the rest of the day! Haha!
2) The other day I had too much caffeine and was overly enthusiastic in my greeting to the UPS man. It was uncomfortable.
Also, our UPS man is very nice and he remembers my name, but I don't know his name, but I can't ask him at this point because it would be awkward to admit I don't know it.
3) A small update on my brother. I saw him last week, and although he is slowing down and sleeping more and more, the hospice nurses say that his vitals are pretty good and he seems to be in good spirits. Please continue to keep him and my mom in mind, because this situation is still very tough.
4) I had to buy a new wedding band, and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. I don't wear my original wedding band and although I already had two alternate rings, one is too small and the other belonged to my grandmother and I'm too scared to wear it because I don't want to lose it!
I went to Wal-Mart (don't judge me) because I knew that they had cheap rings there, and I picked out a wide silver band. I think it might be a man's ring, though, because it's very thick and not-at-all feminine. It feels like I'm wearing a hula hoop on my hand. It's also very shiny, which makes me feel self conscious! Eh, well, it fits, and people can see it, so everyone will know I am married. That's what they're for, right?
I guess I could have shelled out for a few diamond stack rings or something, but why be vulgar, dahling? Haha! I'll worry about having diamonds when I'm older and have paid off more bills.
5) I wore some metallic green lipstick to work to mess with my boss. That probably sounds kind of silly, but you have to understand, the pastor at my church is easily distracted by anything even the slightest bit unusual, so I felt it was my duty to play this little joke. Unfortunately, he didn't come into work, so I figured my coworker (who is also usually very observant and critical about anything even slightly unusual) would get a kick out of it.
Either he never noticed it, or he was not in the mood, because even though we had a conversation, he never mentioned it. I was honestly surprised, because it is exactly the kind of thing he'd normally jump right on to. I was determined to play it out, even though I looked ridiculous, but he never said anything. I finally had to try and take it off, because eating breakfast was smearing it around. I say I "tired" to take it off, because the stupid stuff stained my lips. I looked like I'd either been deprived of oxygen, or that I'd had a hot date with Kermit the Frog.
*EDIT: The pastor came to work late and noticed that my lips were the wrong color, even though the lipstick was gone. I am TICKED that he didn't get to see them green! It would have been funny.
6) OK, about the otters and why I abandoned them for a bit: Someone told me (innocently, of course) that otters do terrible things. I googled what it was, and yes, some otters do terrible things to baby seals. I couldn't get that out of my head for a while, so every time I saw otters, I thought of what I had learned about them. I mean, yeah, that's silly, but since I used pictures of otters to kind of forget
about the bad things of the world, it was no fun to think "Oh, how cute! Well, except for the ones who do these terrible things! In fact, forget how cute they are! They do terrible things!" That is, unfortunately, the way my mind works sometimes. Heh. Anyway, I've come to terms with the fact that, just like people, some of them are bastards and some are adorable, so I'm going to focus on the adorable ones.
They make me feel better. Shut up.
7) Sometimes I make poor choices. I hope you fine people can still love me in spite of that.
Friday, September 29, 2017
Thursday, September 28, 2017
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'm taking otters back! I don't care if some of them commit atrocities! I think they're adorable and they make me feel better when I'm sad.
I'm not even sad right now, but I'm still putting up an otter because it's cute!
Never let anyone take away your otters.
That is all.
Wednesday, September 27, 2017
TEN YEARS
It occurred to me a couple of days ago that it will have been 10 years ago this coming Sunday (October 1st) that my father passed away.
It probably sounds odd to say that it "occurred" to me, because it seems like I should have the dates marked on a calendar, but really, missing someone doesn't work like that. Well, at least not for me. There really isn't a timeline in grief, it just is. It goes back and forth between better and worse over and over, like the tides, but it never goes away. Even though you are aware of the days and hours, it also runs altogether into one big wash of time.
Ten years, though. Somehow it seems like it just happened yesterday and sometimes it feels like it happened a hundred years ago. Haha, how's that for a cliche?
I don't remember a whole lot about that time, because everything seemed so unreal, but the things I do remember are hard set in my mind. Sara brought food to my mom's house and Steve had to bring me clothes - but nothing he brought fit exactly right. A friend from church came by my mom's house and I was confused because I didn't know how she knew where I was. Kenny came to my dad's visitation, stayed to the very end, and was the first person to make me laugh in days. His mom, Bonita, wrote me the kindest letter afterwards because she knew what it was like to lose a father unexpectedly. Our cousins Greg, Amy, and Kristin drove three hours to be there for the funeral, and Steve's boss sent a basket of beautiful flowers. It's weird what you remember about times like that, but those are all wonderful things to remember about such an awful time, so I'm glad those memories stayed.
Thinking about his passing has also made me think of the past ten years and everything that has happened. I wonder what he'd think about all of it? For at least the five years following his death, every year I lost so much and so much changed. I changed. I'm not the same person that I was, and it makes me wonder if he would even like me now. I hope so! It's hard not to let yourself become hard and cynical when you're faced with certain things, but would him being here to talk to have made any of that better? I dunno.
Heh, I actually started out hoping to wrote an eloquent, heartfelt ode to my dad, but it didn't end up being that, did it? That's ok, though. Some people would be much better at expressing themselves than I am, but for me, all I can say is that I miss him and I wish he was here. I'll probably always feel that way.
One thing I've learned through his death and all that followed is that losing someone you love doesn't really get easier. It doesn't matter if they die, if they just lose touch, or if your relationship with them changes in some significant, but diminished, way. If you ever truly cared anything about them, it hurts when that happens. It's unfair that people can suddenly be out of your life before you're finished loving them.
And that's all I've got to say about that.
It probably sounds odd to say that it "occurred" to me, because it seems like I should have the dates marked on a calendar, but really, missing someone doesn't work like that. Well, at least not for me. There really isn't a timeline in grief, it just is. It goes back and forth between better and worse over and over, like the tides, but it never goes away. Even though you are aware of the days and hours, it also runs altogether into one big wash of time.
Ten years, though. Somehow it seems like it just happened yesterday and sometimes it feels like it happened a hundred years ago. Haha, how's that for a cliche?
I don't remember a whole lot about that time, because everything seemed so unreal, but the things I do remember are hard set in my mind. Sara brought food to my mom's house and Steve had to bring me clothes - but nothing he brought fit exactly right. A friend from church came by my mom's house and I was confused because I didn't know how she knew where I was. Kenny came to my dad's visitation, stayed to the very end, and was the first person to make me laugh in days. His mom, Bonita, wrote me the kindest letter afterwards because she knew what it was like to lose a father unexpectedly. Our cousins Greg, Amy, and Kristin drove three hours to be there for the funeral, and Steve's boss sent a basket of beautiful flowers. It's weird what you remember about times like that, but those are all wonderful things to remember about such an awful time, so I'm glad those memories stayed.
Thinking about his passing has also made me think of the past ten years and everything that has happened. I wonder what he'd think about all of it? For at least the five years following his death, every year I lost so much and so much changed. I changed. I'm not the same person that I was, and it makes me wonder if he would even like me now. I hope so! It's hard not to let yourself become hard and cynical when you're faced with certain things, but would him being here to talk to have made any of that better? I dunno.
Heh, I actually started out hoping to wrote an eloquent, heartfelt ode to my dad, but it didn't end up being that, did it? That's ok, though. Some people would be much better at expressing themselves than I am, but for me, all I can say is that I miss him and I wish he was here. I'll probably always feel that way.
One thing I've learned through his death and all that followed is that losing someone you love doesn't really get easier. It doesn't matter if they die, if they just lose touch, or if your relationship with them changes in some significant, but diminished, way. If you ever truly cared anything about them, it hurts when that happens. It's unfair that people can suddenly be out of your life before you're finished loving them.
And that's all I've got to say about that.
Thursday, September 21, 2017
MORE RANDOM ACTS OF BLOGGING
1) Ugh. One of our long time church deacons passed away yesterday, and I have been helping set up certain aspects of the funeral service. It's never easy to help with a funeral, but I'm glad to do it because people in mourning aren't usually in the right frame of mind to handle all the little details that they want taken care of. My particular job is to handle the A/V for the service, and that means I make sure the music that they want is available, that the photo slide shows are created, and that the service is set up to run smoothly. Not a fun job, but one I am suited for, I guess.
Today I was working on putting everything together in the sanctuary computer so that when I get the order of service, I can put everything where it needed to go. The family had sent me a list of 3 songs that had to be downloaded to be included in the service, and because of the program we use to run services (it's specific to churches to make things flow) I had to run the files within that program to make sure that we had the music in its entirety. One song was the Navy song, "Anchors Aweigh," one song was a hymn, and one song was "Go Rest High On That Mountain." Damnit.
That song. That damnable song. I cry every time I hear it. There are reasons, which I will not go into here, that it punches me right in the feelings and I can't get through it with any dignity. Today, though, (and I'll explain why further down) I thought that I was going to make it all the way through with no problem. I was sitting in the back of the church, singing along, thinking to myself that I was doing very well and then BOOM! Snotty, ugly, full on sobbing. I couldn't stop. Even when the song was over, I had to sit there and collect myself before going back into the office.
To add insult to injury, I had decided to wear what I thought was waterproof mascara today, only to find out that it was most assuredly NOT water proof. I looked like a psychotic racoon. Also, wiping my eyes caused both of my contacts to fold in half and slide into the corners of my eyes, which, if you've ever worn contacts, you know hurts like the devil. So I had to go into the bathroom and try and repair my face and my eyes, and after all the sobbing and such, I looked like a sad, asthmatic clown and all I wanted to do was go home and eat a whole bag of potato chips. Chips help sadness. It's science.
How in the world am I supposed to actually run this stuff during the service on Saturday, when I can't even get through the one song when setting it up? Oy.
2) OMG, I am so embarrassed! I had to go run some errands earlier this week, and when I got out to the car, I clicked the remote to open the doors, heard them unlock, and then tried to open the door. I say tried, because the door didn't move, but I know that it had unlocked because I'd heard the click. Turns out, it wasn't my car. It wasn't a Volkswagen and it wasn't even really the same shape as my car. The only thing it WAS, was red. My car was parked right next to the one I tried to open, which is why I heard the locks click, but apparently I walked right past it.
Seriously, folks, how do I still not know what my car looks like? Granted, I drove the Seabring for 12 years, but still, I've never had this much trouble learning my new cars when I change one. I'm going to have to get some stickers or something for the back window, because I need some sort of indicator that I'm actually at my own vehicle. This is getting embarrassing!
3) I mentioned in my last entry that my doctor had put me on antidepressants (to help me with panic attacks) and I hate them. No, let me rephrase. I HAAAAAAAAAAATE THEM!
Now, I know this is going to sound kind of personal, but I hope you won't mind if I kind of describe the experience I'm having with this medication as things progress. It takes several weeks before it establishes itself into your chemical makeup, so changes come in stages. I've had to take this kind of stuff at least twice before in my life (for different reasons) and this is the first time I've been so aware of the changes it's making as it's actually happening. I think it'll help me to talk about it a little.
I've already told you about how I can't focus and how I'm gaining weight at an alarming pace. The weight thing I expected, because the universe is a terrible place, but not being able to focus on anything is hard! I already have the attention span of a ferret with ADHD, but now it's worse! I'm either unable to sleep, or so tired I fall asleep whenever I sit down. I think the worst of it, though, is that now that the medicine has begun to work on my brain chemicals, I'm beginning to notice times when my feelings are getting numb. Not all of them, of course, because that would make the most sense, but I don't really feel happy or joy or anything like that. During those times, if I feel anything, I mostly feel sad, scared or irritated. I also have times when I don't want to do anything at all. I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to go to work, I don't want to be around people, I don't want to watch TV, I don't want to read, or do crafts, or do my graphics work, or go anywhere. I just want to lie in bed and not do anything except communicate by email and internet, because it feels less complicated than real life. It feels exactly like being in a deep depression, only without the depression. That part actually scares me the most, because I've been a zombie on this type of medication before, and it makes you not care about anyone or anything. I don't want to be like that again. I'm afraid of the toll that it will take on my friendships and relationships. There are people I love so much, and what if I can't show them? Will I stop contacting them, or cut myself off from everyone? Will I start feeling like I don't need them anymore? I really, really don't want to do that to anyone. Not that anyone really relies on me, I guess, but the people I love, I love a lot, so what if I start avoiding them? What if someone needs me? Will I be able to help them? What will happen when I'm taken off of this medicine at some point? Will I have irreparably scarred my friendships by not being emotionally available, or even physically available? I'm concerned that all of that will happen, even though it might not be as bad as all of that, but it's a possibility! I don't want to hurt anyone! I don't have a surplus of friends, and I'd like to keep the ones I have, if you please. It sucks. I'm thankful, at this point at least, that I don't feel like that all of the time. I can pull myself out of the funk and be somewhat normal, but it's when I'm not actively trying to engage with people that I slip into that...blah-ness. So I guess I'm sort of letting everyone know, before I go into that possible trance-esque state, that I still love you and will be back to normal as soon as I can! Please don't go anywhere!
You have no idea how much I wish I didn't need to be put on this stuff. I'd just like to have a normal brain, please! Well, as normal as could be I guess, haha. I guess at this point it's better than having a panic attack and thinking I'm dying. That'll be my silver lining for today!
4) Today is the last day of summer! Woo-Hoo! Everyone pull out the tall boots and the sweaters! Of course, it'll still be in the 80s up until December here, but I like the idea of fall at least! Bring on the colored leaves!
Today I was working on putting everything together in the sanctuary computer so that when I get the order of service, I can put everything where it needed to go. The family had sent me a list of 3 songs that had to be downloaded to be included in the service, and because of the program we use to run services (it's specific to churches to make things flow) I had to run the files within that program to make sure that we had the music in its entirety. One song was the Navy song, "Anchors Aweigh," one song was a hymn, and one song was "Go Rest High On That Mountain." Damnit.
That song. That damnable song. I cry every time I hear it. There are reasons, which I will not go into here, that it punches me right in the feelings and I can't get through it with any dignity. Today, though, (and I'll explain why further down) I thought that I was going to make it all the way through with no problem. I was sitting in the back of the church, singing along, thinking to myself that I was doing very well and then BOOM! Snotty, ugly, full on sobbing. I couldn't stop. Even when the song was over, I had to sit there and collect myself before going back into the office.
To add insult to injury, I had decided to wear what I thought was waterproof mascara today, only to find out that it was most assuredly NOT water proof. I looked like a psychotic racoon. Also, wiping my eyes caused both of my contacts to fold in half and slide into the corners of my eyes, which, if you've ever worn contacts, you know hurts like the devil. So I had to go into the bathroom and try and repair my face and my eyes, and after all the sobbing and such, I looked like a sad, asthmatic clown and all I wanted to do was go home and eat a whole bag of potato chips. Chips help sadness. It's science.
How in the world am I supposed to actually run this stuff during the service on Saturday, when I can't even get through the one song when setting it up? Oy.
2) OMG, I am so embarrassed! I had to go run some errands earlier this week, and when I got out to the car, I clicked the remote to open the doors, heard them unlock, and then tried to open the door. I say tried, because the door didn't move, but I know that it had unlocked because I'd heard the click. Turns out, it wasn't my car. It wasn't a Volkswagen and it wasn't even really the same shape as my car. The only thing it WAS, was red. My car was parked right next to the one I tried to open, which is why I heard the locks click, but apparently I walked right past it.
Seriously, folks, how do I still not know what my car looks like? Granted, I drove the Seabring for 12 years, but still, I've never had this much trouble learning my new cars when I change one. I'm going to have to get some stickers or something for the back window, because I need some sort of indicator that I'm actually at my own vehicle. This is getting embarrassing!
3) I mentioned in my last entry that my doctor had put me on antidepressants (to help me with panic attacks) and I hate them. No, let me rephrase. I HAAAAAAAAAAATE THEM!
Now, I know this is going to sound kind of personal, but I hope you won't mind if I kind of describe the experience I'm having with this medication as things progress. It takes several weeks before it establishes itself into your chemical makeup, so changes come in stages. I've had to take this kind of stuff at least twice before in my life (for different reasons) and this is the first time I've been so aware of the changes it's making as it's actually happening. I think it'll help me to talk about it a little.
I've already told you about how I can't focus and how I'm gaining weight at an alarming pace. The weight thing I expected, because the universe is a terrible place, but not being able to focus on anything is hard! I already have the attention span of a ferret with ADHD, but now it's worse! I'm either unable to sleep, or so tired I fall asleep whenever I sit down. I think the worst of it, though, is that now that the medicine has begun to work on my brain chemicals, I'm beginning to notice times when my feelings are getting numb. Not all of them, of course, because that would make the most sense, but I don't really feel happy or joy or anything like that. During those times, if I feel anything, I mostly feel sad, scared or irritated. I also have times when I don't want to do anything at all. I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to go to work, I don't want to be around people, I don't want to watch TV, I don't want to read, or do crafts, or do my graphics work, or go anywhere. I just want to lie in bed and not do anything except communicate by email and internet, because it feels less complicated than real life. It feels exactly like being in a deep depression, only without the depression. That part actually scares me the most, because I've been a zombie on this type of medication before, and it makes you not care about anyone or anything. I don't want to be like that again. I'm afraid of the toll that it will take on my friendships and relationships. There are people I love so much, and what if I can't show them? Will I stop contacting them, or cut myself off from everyone? Will I start feeling like I don't need them anymore? I really, really don't want to do that to anyone. Not that anyone really relies on me, I guess, but the people I love, I love a lot, so what if I start avoiding them? What if someone needs me? Will I be able to help them? What will happen when I'm taken off of this medicine at some point? Will I have irreparably scarred my friendships by not being emotionally available, or even physically available? I'm concerned that all of that will happen, even though it might not be as bad as all of that, but it's a possibility! I don't want to hurt anyone! I don't have a surplus of friends, and I'd like to keep the ones I have, if you please. It sucks. I'm thankful, at this point at least, that I don't feel like that all of the time. I can pull myself out of the funk and be somewhat normal, but it's when I'm not actively trying to engage with people that I slip into that...blah-ness. So I guess I'm sort of letting everyone know, before I go into that possible trance-esque state, that I still love you and will be back to normal as soon as I can! Please don't go anywhere!
You have no idea how much I wish I didn't need to be put on this stuff. I'd just like to have a normal brain, please! Well, as normal as could be I guess, haha. I guess at this point it's better than having a panic attack and thinking I'm dying. That'll be my silver lining for today!
4) Today is the last day of summer! Woo-Hoo! Everyone pull out the tall boots and the sweaters! Of course, it'll still be in the 80s up until December here, but I like the idea of fall at least! Bring on the colored leaves!
Wednesday, September 13, 2017
RANDOM ACTS OF BLOGGING
1) OK, so this is new. Did you know that I have a form of OCD? I sure didn't. I don't have to touch the doorknob 23 times before leaving the house, nor do I aggressively clean and organize the house (which is really too bad) but apparently it has to do with my thought patterns. You know how I tend to get a song stuck in my head for days and days? That is a part of it! How weird is that?
I had to go to the doctor a few weeks ago for a checkup and I told her about my panic attacks. I don't know what I thought she could do about them, but it's certainly not normal to wake up in the middle of the night almost every night with the feeling that the world is going to end, right? So, as I'm explaining this to her, she asked if part of these panic attacks included thoughts that seemed to overwhelm me, and I told her yes (because that's how panic attacks work) and so she put me on medicine for them. I was not happy. The surgery I had not long ago was specifically done to take me off of one of the two prescriptions I've been on, because I was tired of taking pills, and now I have to take an antidepressant of all things.
Don't get me wrong, it does help the thought looping. I'm good with that, I guess. I still wake up with the physical symptoms of the panic attacks, and I gain weight super easily, and I can't focus for shit on anything for more than 25 minutes or so, but at least I don't have Fat Bottomed Girls looping through my head on a daily basis. Silver lining.
2) I heard the robot voice again. Steve and I were sitting at the table looking at some papers and I heard the freaking robot voice again, and Steve didn't hear it and he wouldn't believe that I heard anything! I promise you, I'm not crazy and I don't normally hear voices, but I swear I heard the robot voice outside of our house again!
I swear on the manger of sweet baby Jesus, that if this is some kind of joke he's playing on me, like when he made my computer talk to me, I will beat him to death with my shoes.
3) I had an odd, but funny, experience the other day. Ok, maybe not as odd as the robot voice (THAT I SWEAR IS FREAKING REAL, YOU GUYS) but still odd. I'm not going to use names, because that would be unnecessarily telling, but almost anyone who personally knows me will know who I'm talking about!
OK, so someone I went to school with is kind of famous now. Not super, everyone would know his name kind of famous, but famous in a certain circle. He and I were pretty good friends back in the day, but I haven't actually seen him in person since we graduated from high school. I've kept up with him on social media, which is why I know he's kind of famous, and I've been following his career with interest because, hey, we were friends and it's neat that he's doing his thing and doing well in it. Good for him! Not long ago, I happened to see him out in the wild, so I ran up to him and gave him a big hug (like I do) and we started talking a little bit. Of course I asked him about his career and all of that, but mainly I just wanted to know how he was doing. While we were talking, I started noticing that he was talking to me the way you'd talk to a little kid. There was a lot of wide eyed, somewhat disingenuous, "Oh really? Wow!" type of reactions to the things I said. I didn't think anything of it at first, but as we kept talking, I realized that he wasn't talking to me like an old friend, or even really listening to me. He was talking to me like he would talk to one of his fans! Full disclosure, while I do follow his career, I don't actually buy his merchandise or go to his events, so I wouldn't call myself a fan! I didn't really know what to do, but I didn't want to make it weird by laughing at him, so I just told him I had to go and waited until I was far enough away to laugh. It was very odd to see someone you spent nearly every day with from 8th-12th grade and be treated like a stranger who's asking for an autograph, but there ya go! Haha!
4) There was more, but that "not being able to focus" thing has robbed me of my memory! Maybe I was going to talk about something awesome, maybe not. I'll probably remember in an hour when I'm nowhere near a computer. Oh, well. We'll pretend I wrote something super interesting here, ok?!
I had to go to the doctor a few weeks ago for a checkup and I told her about my panic attacks. I don't know what I thought she could do about them, but it's certainly not normal to wake up in the middle of the night almost every night with the feeling that the world is going to end, right? So, as I'm explaining this to her, she asked if part of these panic attacks included thoughts that seemed to overwhelm me, and I told her yes (because that's how panic attacks work) and so she put me on medicine for them. I was not happy. The surgery I had not long ago was specifically done to take me off of one of the two prescriptions I've been on, because I was tired of taking pills, and now I have to take an antidepressant of all things.
Don't get me wrong, it does help the thought looping. I'm good with that, I guess. I still wake up with the physical symptoms of the panic attacks, and I gain weight super easily, and I can't focus for shit on anything for more than 25 minutes or so, but at least I don't have Fat Bottomed Girls looping through my head on a daily basis. Silver lining.
2) I heard the robot voice again. Steve and I were sitting at the table looking at some papers and I heard the freaking robot voice again, and Steve didn't hear it and he wouldn't believe that I heard anything! I promise you, I'm not crazy and I don't normally hear voices, but I swear I heard the robot voice outside of our house again!
I swear on the manger of sweet baby Jesus, that if this is some kind of joke he's playing on me, like when he made my computer talk to me, I will beat him to death with my shoes.
3) I had an odd, but funny, experience the other day. Ok, maybe not as odd as the robot voice (THAT I SWEAR IS FREAKING REAL, YOU GUYS) but still odd. I'm not going to use names, because that would be unnecessarily telling, but almost anyone who personally knows me will know who I'm talking about!
OK, so someone I went to school with is kind of famous now. Not super, everyone would know his name kind of famous, but famous in a certain circle. He and I were pretty good friends back in the day, but I haven't actually seen him in person since we graduated from high school. I've kept up with him on social media, which is why I know he's kind of famous, and I've been following his career with interest because, hey, we were friends and it's neat that he's doing his thing and doing well in it. Good for him! Not long ago, I happened to see him out in the wild, so I ran up to him and gave him a big hug (like I do) and we started talking a little bit. Of course I asked him about his career and all of that, but mainly I just wanted to know how he was doing. While we were talking, I started noticing that he was talking to me the way you'd talk to a little kid. There was a lot of wide eyed, somewhat disingenuous, "Oh really? Wow!" type of reactions to the things I said. I didn't think anything of it at first, but as we kept talking, I realized that he wasn't talking to me like an old friend, or even really listening to me. He was talking to me like he would talk to one of his fans! Full disclosure, while I do follow his career, I don't actually buy his merchandise or go to his events, so I wouldn't call myself a fan! I didn't really know what to do, but I didn't want to make it weird by laughing at him, so I just told him I had to go and waited until I was far enough away to laugh. It was very odd to see someone you spent nearly every day with from 8th-12th grade and be treated like a stranger who's asking for an autograph, but there ya go! Haha!
4) There was more, but that "not being able to focus" thing has robbed me of my memory! Maybe I was going to talk about something awesome, maybe not. I'll probably remember in an hour when I'm nowhere near a computer. Oh, well. We'll pretend I wrote something super interesting here, ok?!
Tuesday, September 12, 2017
Tuesday, September 05, 2017
BLOGGED AFTER THE FACT: PART 5 - AN ECLIPSE, A GOOD BOY, AND A LONG DRIVE HOME
We left fairly early Monday morning and headed back to Valdosta. We did make a stop at the Jacksonville Trader Joes, because when you don't have a local Trader Joes, you have to make a haul when you find one, amiright? The cookie butter alone...oh my.
We made it back to Sara's house right as the solar eclipse was starting. If there was anything I regretted about this particular trip, it was that I was so far away from eclipse totality. Eh, it's ok. If I'm still alive in 7 years, hopefully I'll get to see it then. At any rate, we all got our stylish cardboard glasses and headed out to the backyard to watch the moon go by. It was still pretty cool, even at 94% totality! It got dimmer outside, and the temperature cooled off considerably, but it wasn't so drastic that it looked much different than just a cloudy day. Still...cool stuff!
Afterwards, Sara and I decided to end our vacation with a bang by getting a couple of Red Box DVDs, getting into our PJs at 4:30 in the afternoon (do NOT judge us), and watching two of the worst movies we've seen in years, "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword" (the dungeon octopus lady is worth checking out, heh) and "Snatched" with Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn...bless their hearts. Still, though, it was nice to hang out and relax.
There was one aspect of the day that wasn't so much fun. I haven't mentioned it before now, because it was very sad, but Sara's 13 year old Jack Russel terrier Scrappy had been very sick. The vet didn't know what was wrong with him, but he had stopped eating and drinking, and would pretty much just follow you around with big, puppy dog eyes, albeit with occasional bursts of barking, but mainly, he just wanted to be held. The vet didn't think he'd make it for very long, but he hung in there the whole time we were in Florida, and seemed to be about the same when we came back. I was glad to be able to see him again, because he was a very sweet dog. So during the movies, Scrappy and I cuddled on the couch, I petted him, and I told him what a good boy he was. I also explained that he didn't need to worry, because when he was ready to go, my own boys would be waiting to play with him when he got to the other side. Needless to say, Sara and I loved on and cried over that dog a lot that afternoon. (Kind of like I'm crying now thinking about it, damnit.) As it turned out, Scrappy hung in there for another few days before Sara finally had to make the call take him to the vet. That's never an easy decision, but it was the best one. He was a very good boy. :(
We basically just hung out, watched TV and talked until I had to go to bed. It was low key, but nice. It was a long drive back to Huntsville, so I was going to have to get up fairly early and gird my loins to drive with the semi-trucks. The next morning I got up, said my goodbyes, and headed home.
As luck would have it, when I was getting my GPS ready for the drive, it gave me a meandering, slightly longer, yet Atlanta-avoiding route home. It was only about 45 minutes longer and instead of driving up I-75, it sort of wobbled through west Georgia, back into east Alabama and headed north. I was fine with that, and as it turned out, it was a much more pleasant drive. Mostly it was rural highways, and some of the roads were so backwoods that it made where I grew up look positively metropolitan, but I managed to avoid the big groups of 18 wheelers and heavy traffic. If I have to complain about anything (and I'm beginning to think that I do, haha) it was that I had no idea where I was for most of the trip. I didn't even realize I'd made it back into Alabama until I passed a sign for Roanoke, Alabama, which I'd never heard of! I found out that I don't know about an awful lot of places in my home state, but I'll remedy that one of these days.
I made it home just after 2:00, and I was glad to see my house. After hauling my stuff in, I immediately took off my pants and fell asleep for about an hour! I love Sara, and her family is awesome, but they haven't reached Kelly Doesn't Wear Pants Around Them status (a high honor, of course, ha!) as of yet, so it had been a long week!
It was a really wonderful trip and I am so glad Sara and I got a chance to get together and act silly for a few days. It's hard when you live so far away from your best friends. Sometimes you don't realize how much you miss them until you get to see them, which makes spending time with them all the better, but the leaving part sucks. It's still worth it, though. :)
So there you have it, folks, a tale for the ages! It had it all: danger, intrigue, exotic locations and lots and lots of food! Hopefully time and circumstance will allow me to visit her, and my other far away friends, so that I can have more adventures to tell you about! Thanks for reliving it with me!
We made it back to Sara's house right as the solar eclipse was starting. If there was anything I regretted about this particular trip, it was that I was so far away from eclipse totality. Eh, it's ok. If I'm still alive in 7 years, hopefully I'll get to see it then. At any rate, we all got our stylish cardboard glasses and headed out to the backyard to watch the moon go by. It was still pretty cool, even at 94% totality! It got dimmer outside, and the temperature cooled off considerably, but it wasn't so drastic that it looked much different than just a cloudy day. Still...cool stuff!
Afterwards, Sara and I decided to end our vacation with a bang by getting a couple of Red Box DVDs, getting into our PJs at 4:30 in the afternoon (do NOT judge us), and watching two of the worst movies we've seen in years, "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword" (the dungeon octopus lady is worth checking out, heh) and "Snatched" with Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn...bless their hearts. Still, though, it was nice to hang out and relax.
There was one aspect of the day that wasn't so much fun. I haven't mentioned it before now, because it was very sad, but Sara's 13 year old Jack Russel terrier Scrappy had been very sick. The vet didn't know what was wrong with him, but he had stopped eating and drinking, and would pretty much just follow you around with big, puppy dog eyes, albeit with occasional bursts of barking, but mainly, he just wanted to be held. The vet didn't think he'd make it for very long, but he hung in there the whole time we were in Florida, and seemed to be about the same when we came back. I was glad to be able to see him again, because he was a very sweet dog. So during the movies, Scrappy and I cuddled on the couch, I petted him, and I told him what a good boy he was. I also explained that he didn't need to worry, because when he was ready to go, my own boys would be waiting to play with him when he got to the other side. Needless to say, Sara and I loved on and cried over that dog a lot that afternoon. (Kind of like I'm crying now thinking about it, damnit.) As it turned out, Scrappy hung in there for another few days before Sara finally had to make the call take him to the vet. That's never an easy decision, but it was the best one. He was a very good boy. :(
We basically just hung out, watched TV and talked until I had to go to bed. It was low key, but nice. It was a long drive back to Huntsville, so I was going to have to get up fairly early and gird my loins to drive with the semi-trucks. The next morning I got up, said my goodbyes, and headed home.
As luck would have it, when I was getting my GPS ready for the drive, it gave me a meandering, slightly longer, yet Atlanta-avoiding route home. It was only about 45 minutes longer and instead of driving up I-75, it sort of wobbled through west Georgia, back into east Alabama and headed north. I was fine with that, and as it turned out, it was a much more pleasant drive. Mostly it was rural highways, and some of the roads were so backwoods that it made where I grew up look positively metropolitan, but I managed to avoid the big groups of 18 wheelers and heavy traffic. If I have to complain about anything (and I'm beginning to think that I do, haha) it was that I had no idea where I was for most of the trip. I didn't even realize I'd made it back into Alabama until I passed a sign for Roanoke, Alabama, which I'd never heard of! I found out that I don't know about an awful lot of places in my home state, but I'll remedy that one of these days.
I made it home just after 2:00, and I was glad to see my house. After hauling my stuff in, I immediately took off my pants and fell asleep for about an hour! I love Sara, and her family is awesome, but they haven't reached Kelly Doesn't Wear Pants Around Them status (a high honor, of course, ha!) as of yet, so it had been a long week!
It was a really wonderful trip and I am so glad Sara and I got a chance to get together and act silly for a few days. It's hard when you live so far away from your best friends. Sometimes you don't realize how much you miss them until you get to see them, which makes spending time with them all the better, but the leaving part sucks. It's still worth it, though. :)
So there you have it, folks, a tale for the ages! It had it all: danger, intrigue, exotic locations and lots and lots of food! Hopefully time and circumstance will allow me to visit her, and my other far away friends, so that I can have more adventures to tell you about! Thanks for reliving it with me!
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