OH, Y'ALL.

Today I went to my first monthly maintenance meeting for the weight loss program we've been doing.

I. Hated. It. Exclamation Point.

I hated it so much that it's hilarious.  I mean that, I was on the verge of cracking up the entire time I was in the room, and the fact that I didn't do so is proof that I have some semblance of self control deep down.  This was how I felt about 15 minutes in:

via GIPHY

Don't get me wrong, I know it's important for us to continue going to these meetings. We need to be held accountable, we need encouragement and guidelines and all of that, and we need the resources to continue with the work we started, but geez.  The worst part of trying to lose weight, and I mean this universally and I'm guilty of it as well, is doing nothing but talking about what you're eating and how you're exercising, and how you aren't doing what you're supposed to be doing. That kind of thing bores me into an itching fit.

That was literally what we did the whole time.  THE. WHOLE. TIME.

Granted, this was an entirely new class of people and we had to do the "go around the room and tell a little bit about ourselves."

via GIPHY

But honestly, I thought we'd been there for an hour and when I looked at the clock, we'd only been there for 20 minutes.  It was brutal.  We had to listen to this man describe every vegetable that he put in a salad.  I'm not exaggerating.  Instead of just saying "I eat salads with no meat" he listed off the entire produce inventory for Whole Foods. He also didn't know how to pronounce "cruciferous." One lady had to explain, in painstaking detail, her day and what she does in it and how she militantly doesn't allow herself to eat except on a schedule and that she asks to take home food from parties just so she can throw it away.  At least two women spent their time berating themselves, like, almost to the point of pulling out a cat-o-nine-tails (not the fun kind) and scourging their own flesh because they'd gained weight.  Steve, one other lady, and I gave a fairly abbreviated description of how we'd been doing since we left the main part of the program and the rest was just some weird self flagellation or grocery list recitation.  It was so uncomfortable that I came very close to getting laugh-in-church syndrome.  I kept trying to catch Steve's eye, but he wouldn't look at me because he was feeling the same way.  Oh, and the topper of the whole thing is that the lady just interrupted me while I was talking and then moved on, which really endeared her to me for life!  Haha.

I know that what we are in is basically a support group, and I know that these people need to talk, and I'm hoping that now that we know one another we don't have to do that part of it again and we can get to talking about nutrition and exercise and more helpful stuff instead of a group misery session.  If we don't, I'm not sure I'll survive . 

via GIPHY

By the way, in case you haven't noticed, I like gifs!