Can you believe it? I actually updated my website. Not anything major of course, but I added a couple of pictures and quotes. I've got to wait until I change over to my Comcast webspace before I can add my artwork. The picture on the home page doesn't really look like me, in my opinion, but maybe that's why I liked it! : ) I can't wait until I take my HTML class so that I re-learn all that stuff I knew in high school. Back then I could code webpages like ringing the proverbial bell, but alas, I have forgotten everything! Nothing like lack of practice.

I saw the movie "The Ladykillers" the other night. It was so funny. Well, it had a little too much bad language for my taste, but other than that it was brilliant. Tom Hanks is just an amazing actor. I recommend this movie to anyone who can get past the bad words.

If you pray, say a little one for me today. I have an exam in my history class, and once again I don't feel prepared. Quite frankly, I want to get this class over and done with ASAP. I love the teacher, I have even grown to enjoy listening to my classmates, but I hate trying to understand Pop Art and Neo-Dada, Abstract Expressionism, and Feminist Post Modernism. I can barely say these things much less know how to interpret them using different independent research topics. Yuck. Summer, come unto me...

I stayed at work alternating working on my exam stuff last night, and e-mailing my friend Kenny. I ended up staying in the office till about 6:30pm, which was kind of creepy. I'm just glad we have security here!

Okay, so last night I thought Steve was either A) Dead or B) Running away from home because when he normally gets out of class and gets home, he wasn't there. I tried calling his cellphone, but no one answered. Anthony calls and asks for him, and says that HE tried the cellphone too, with no results. Of course, being my mothers daughter, I immediately see him lying in a ditch somewhere dead while it rained on him. I panic a little, but I figure he's gone out to dinner with someone and just didn't tell me, but that isn't like him, so I panic a little more. He finally calls me, and it turns out he was fixing someone's computer and thought he had told me. He also left his phone in the car, which accounts for the not answering. I was so relieved that he was okay that I went ahead and put him on a guilt trip.

Spring Break Is Over (SOB)

Yuck, I have to go back to school today! I have been out of the school mood since about February, but I've still got April and the beginning of May to go. : ( I just have to keep repeating to myself: - I'm going to graduate one day, I'm going to graduate one day...

I tried doing some changes to my blog Friday night, but I'm completely ignorant as far as the BLOG is concerned. I was going to add an archive, but I could never get it to work, so I just went in and removed the word "Archive" from my site (see right of screen). Now I don't feel like I have to have one!

Josh came to church with Steve last night. I was down in the kitchen getting stuff ready for the dinner we had afterwards (you know us Baptists and our eating...). I love it when Josh comes to our church because he's VERY Catholic and he seems to get a kick out of being there. He also got to hit on the preacher's daughter. That's just a sitcom waiting to happen.

I'm having a bad hair/clothes/face day. Isn't it amazing how having a bad hair day can just ruin everything? I knew the minute I dried my hair that nothing could be done. I also look like I just rolled around on the floor and wore whatever clothes stuck to me, although the "Free Martha" tee-shirt was a premeditated decision.

I'm jkust about ready to give up and move to a beach somewhere where I give people henna tattoos for a living. Anyone want to join me? ; )

I AM WOMAN....

Sharon and I are once again alone in the trailer working the weekend, and we just had an invigorating moment of killing 3 rogue wasps that had infiltrated our workspace. I grabbed the 409 spray bottle and she grabbed the broom. Together we rid the room of the evil, alien looking little creatures. I sprayed them to the floor and she beat them to death. I had a Charlie's Angels moment when I did a two handed aim with the spray bottle and knocked that sucker down (and it also had a little bit to do with my hair being big today, too). After it was all over, Sharon yelled across the room "Wonder Twin powers unite!" It was a riot. We must have looked like lunatics waving our cleaning-supply death implements around and screaming. We are such girls... ; )

I got an obscene phone call today, and it wasn't even my phone! That's the last time I pick up a ringing pay phone. Oh yeah, note to whomever was on the other end of the line: it is NOT sexy for a man (or boy) to say dirty things with a soft, breathy voice. EW!

Ugh.
I had an unpleasant discovery today. You know, one of those where you feel like your eyeballs might explode and you break out in a cold sweat. I don't really want to discuss what it was because it would only be proof positive how shallow and insecure I can be. Let's just say that I now want to crawl into a hole, because I know that if the right person was to ever come into contact with me, it would be lorded over me in a most heinous way.

I think I might throw up. If you will excuse me.

Star Trek Guy...

So I get another call from Star Trek guy. I already feel horrible about the fact that he was told he wasn't allowed to call me back, but he had started calling me 3 or 4 times a day, and it was completely out of hand. Anyways, he called me (while I was helping to train a new account execuitve) and started asking me if he had told me about the new F-16s and F18s that he had designed. I told him yes, he had. Then he said in this sad little voice "I don't mean to bother you ma'am" and it tore my heart out. I had to tell him that he wasn't bothering me but we were really busy, so I couldn't talk to him right then. : ( He makes me sad. All I could think of was what if I were all alone with no one to talk to? SIGH. I hate sad things...

I'm so tired!

I went to Wal-Mart yesterday to get some plants with the intention of starting my flower bed. I got 6 tulip plants and 3 azalea (did I spell that right?) bushes. We are supposed to be tilling up the ground right in front of the house, but we haven't gotten to that yet, so I grabbed the shovel and hoe and went to town on a 5' x 3' patch of ground in front of our walkway. It took me 2 1/2 hours to get through the grass roots and clear enough to plant the durn things! It looks funny though! We have a tiny little plot, completely detached from anything else, and it looks more like a vegetable garden than a flower bed. The tulips look like a row of corn, and the daffodils look like onions. All that work and it looks like a victory garden or something! Oh well. As soon as we can finish it up, hopefully our house will look as landscaped as the others on our street. I'm not so much trying to "keep up with the Joneses" as I am hoping that they aren't plotting to have us moved out for not being lawn monkeys! Seriously, almost everyone on our street is either retired, and they have plenty of time to work in their yard, or they are lawyers or executives who can afford to have it landscaped professionally. Sigh. I'm sure I'm just being paranoid, but I just get the feeling that our neighbors think we're bringing down property value! : )

11 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. 12 I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. 13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Philipians 4:11-13

I'm the worst Aunt/Cousin ever!

On March 2nd, My cousin Amy had a beutiful little boy she named Sean. He is so adorable. The report from Amy says that he is a very good baby, and he is getting a lot of love and attention from his big sister! : ) Anyways, I will be sure to post some pictures as soon as I can. I've actually got a couple, but I'm having trouble with my computer when I try to edit them so that they'll fit. I promise to post them as soon as I can.
I have been so busy worrying about everything else that I never mentioned him! SORRY AMY!

Sigh...

I just finished mowing the yard, and I didn't - not once- reach Lawnmower Zen. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's the moment that you reach -while riding on your lawnmower- when you just relax and let your thoughts drift towards lovely, inciteful things. I've got too much on my mind this weekend for zen of any kind. I've got trouble at work that is just so stupid that I don't even know how to resolve it, I've got a friend who will be proposing to his girlfriend any day now (and she can't stand me-wow, this happens a lot doesn't it? : )-, so I'll lose him for good when they get married), and school is wearing me down to nubs. I'm literally so stressed at this point that I hurt all over. If I could get under my bed, I'd do it.

How Funny!

I was just reading about a bill that has been proposed to protect fast food resturaunts from getting sued by people who are overweight. Are people really doing this? How awesomely stupid! I don't know about you, but I know when I go to McDonald's and have a Big Mac, I'm not exactly looking out for my own best interests health wise. Trust me, I've seen the nutritional info on what they serve...and I still eat there. It has been delegated to a guilty pleasure, of course, but I know what I'm doing when I'm there. What do these people say when they go to their lawyers? "Um, yes, I am morbidly obese and it's because I eat fast food for every meal. However, it's not my fault. I can't resist the call of the french fries! Every time I went in there, a pimply fry cook would overpower me and stuff a burger in my mouth! I'm almost positive that someone is taking fat and injecting it directly into my butt!" I mean, come on people...you're going to sue some place that is completely innocent of harming you? What garbage.

You know what else...they'd probably use their winnings to go to Burger King and celebrate.

Another day...

I am so out of it this morning! I went to sleep fairly early, but I'm still like a zombie. Maybe I got up in the middle of the night and went running in my sleep! Nah, I don't think so. I don't do that while I'm awake. : )

Speaking of exercise, I got a wild idea yesterday to go for a walk. I strap on my MP3 player and head out the door. The walk was great, I was feeling good, and so when I got back to the house I thought to myself, "Hey, I'll do some situps too!" So I'm in the floor doing that when I realize that I can't get up! I'm too dizzy. Then I remembered that all I'd had to eat that day was a pack of peanut butter crackers around noon and some tea. Note to self, if you're going to do any strenuous exercise, eat first. So I drag myself to the kitchen and throw some chicken into a pan and put it in the oven only to realize that the oven was, in fact, not working. Steve had turned the breaker off the other day when he upended the dog's water dish near the floor outlet and had forgotten to turn it back on (which I didn't find out till much later)! Thank God for Chinese delivery! : )

Well, I'm in a much better frame of mind today I think. I had a talk with Steve last night about the problem I've been having, and he forced me to be logical and wait to see what happens before I jump to the wrong conclusion. I also prayed about what to do, and right now it seems I should wait and see, so that's what I'm going to do. Don't worry, it's not a health issue or anything. It involves a friend of mine I'm worried about.
On to lighter subjects. Last night Steve, Josh, and I met at Barnes and Noble (gotta love a bookstore) and had frappachinos. How very townie of us, no? : ) We had a good time and we laughed a lot. I love being with my friends, I just wish all of my friends lived nearby. Two of my best ones live in Birmingham, so I don't get to see them unless we make special plans, but that's okay. We always have fun when we do that too. I keep up with them by e-mail, so I'm especially glad for the internet!
One of Josh's students came into the cafe and we flattered him beyond belief because he was in two plays that we had seen, and Steve told him how good he thought he did. He blushed and said "Thank's sir". Steve got "sir-ed"! He felt old all the rest of the evening.
Sara sent me a funny e-card from a place called davidandgoliath.com or somethg like that. It was so cute. I need to get one of those shirts! : )
I had a lot more to say, but I can't remember any of the rest! I'll come back later!

Heeheehee...

I woke up sometime around 3:00am this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I don't know if you'll understand this, but when this happens to me I start getting paraniod about things that are really stupid. I'm guessing it has something to do with still being partially asleep in the brain. Anywho, I started thinking about my last entry and realized that at least three people could take what I said and completely misinterpret it (if they are still reading my blog, that is.) One of them will be feeling smug, thinking they've won some kind of battle over me. One will get irritated because they'll think I'm commenting on their lifestyle, and one will feel bad thinking that they have offended me with a recent conversation. The funny thing is, it isn't any of those things, and none of them have any idea what I was really talking about! Oy vey.

I Don't Care Anymore.

OK, that's a lie. I do care. However, I'm not going to let it make me feel bad.

Ok, that's a lie too. Okay, how about this: I won't act like it bothers me.

Ok, that is also a lie. How about I only act like it bothers me when I'm home alone with my dogs. Then I can eat chocolate and cry if I need to and no one will need to feel uncomfortable about it but me and the dogs. Then when I hit the angry days, I can throw stuff and say mean things in my head that I'd never say in person. That's more probable.

Okay, now I have a plan.

Rescue Me.....

We are in our last day of the Early Bird registration and we have been swamped with calls. I don't want to talk on the phone anymore. Someone come and get me...PLEASE.

How Embarrassing.

Could someone please remember to remind me to wear pants? I embarrassed myself so badly today. I was still in my nightgown, i.e. tee-shirt, while I was cleaning the house today. I was going to open the door to air out the room since it was such a nice day, and right when I opened the door something on TV caught my attention. While I was just standing there in the doorway watching whatever it was, I remembered that I wasn't wearing any pants AND that the neighbors across the street had company. I was horrified! I just slammed the door and ran for some sweats. Eeeeeesh.

I HATE POLITICS

Since I turned 18 and was allowed to vote, I have only voted in one election of any kind. Most people think I'm crazy when I tell them that. I realize that it is a priveldge to be able to choose the people who run our government, but frankly, I haven't found even one politician who I respect enough to vote for. I can't stand election times when all you see on tv and hear on the radio are those one sided, hateful, advertisements that don't so much tell us what the politician in question stands for as it just puts down the opposition. I think I would be more willing to give a rats behind if just one man or woman who wanted to run for office would just bring forward what they are going to do and what they stand for instead of these childish playground tactics that I've always seen. I can respect an opponant that tries to win on their own merit rather than trying to make the other guy look worse than him/her. I don't like that the "Lesser of the two evils" is the way we are persuaded to choose who runs our country. So there. Nyeah.

WOMEN ARE WEIRD

You know, I was pondering something early this morning while getting ready for work. Women (and I say this without malice since I are one) are really odd. We will have our hair artificially colored or permed, we paint our faces and fingernails, we will chemically alter our reproductive cycles, and we will starve ourselves to be thinner. We have plastic surgeons cut us up, remove parts of our stomachs so we don't eat as much, and stretch, nip and tuck us (basically physically torture our bodies) to fit into societies ideal of beauty. We pretend to be dumber than we really are to keep some guys from being intimidated or act smarter so that some men will not be bored with us. We wear uncomfortable clothes that look silly because they are in style and we will wear shoes that give us back and feet problems because they are considered sexy. Most women (not all mind you) do one or more of these things to themselves on a regular basis. We spend most of our lives doing unnatural things to ourselves, BUT, we will spend all of our money, much more than necessary anyway, for products that have "Natural" ingredients. It seems a little absurd!
I'm sure that somewhere deep inside our collective unconscious (thanks Sartre) that we have a reasonable excuse for this, but I don't know why it is. I never really thought about it until I was in the shower this morning, and I was surrounded by the plethora of Bath and Body Works bottles, the Burt's Bees products, and shampoos whose list of ingredients read like the contents of a salad bar. Does anyone have any idea? I'd like to hear a couple of them! : )

Chocolate=Nightmares

I feel so silly. As some of you know, I've been having the violent nightmares that had left me with this horrible sense of doom even after I've woken up. After one particular dream, I was do depressed that I didn't want to get out of bed or go to work! Well, I sat back to see what could possibly be causing these nightmares. I didn't know if I was having prophetic dreams (which I'd had before, so don't laugh) or if it was some kind of chemical reaction in my body due to the meds I'm taking. Okay, so here's what I came up with. On the days I wasn't taking my diet pill, I would get a strong craving close to bedtime for something sweet. Since Ms. Rhonda sent both Steve and I a Whitman's Sampler, I would just grab one or two chocolates and have them before I went to bed. Those were the nights that I had these nightmares. I thought to myself "That's kind of stupid, why would chocolate give you nightmares!" So I decided to do an expirement. Josh gave me a box of Godiva (which makes him my favorite man for this week) as a late birthday present. So I decided last night to eat a piece before going to bed, just to see what happened. Sure enough, I had another nightmare (albeit, it wasn't as bad as the others had been). Apparently, chocolate before bed is a no-no for me now. Now that I know what is causing them, I think it's funny! : )

Ugh.

Yay! I've lost 2 pounds so far. Yeah, I know, that's not a whole lot, but it's a start. I'm not going to lie to you people, though. My doctor gave me a prescription for an anphetamine called Phentramine. It makes me hyper and it completely kills my appatite and I forget to eat. It's good because my biggest problem was over eating (a side affect of birth control pills is an increased appatite). It's bad because I forget to eat, and then I get woozy and tired. So I'm losing weight by systematically starving myself. Granted, not a great way to lose weight, but it's the only thing that has gotten me started. I'm hoping that once the weather gets better that I can start walking or riding my bike again. Just not eating isn't going to cut it. I'm going to have to do some excercise. I'm more determined now that I have been in a long time. Keep me in your thoughts! : )
Bear came home yesterday and he went nuts. I guess he was afraid that we were going to leave him again. When I put him into his kennel when we got home from the vet, I had to walk outside to get something, and he went crazy. I let him out when I came back inside, and he would follow me around really closely and not let me out of his site. It was so sad. We finally had to put him back in his kennel and until we brought Butler in and put him to bed, he whined and barked like crazy. It was so weird. I guess he just wanted to see his brother. How sweet!
I had a heifer of a time with the dentist yesterday! I had an appointment at 7:30am, so I arrived at about 7:20 in case they could take me early. They didn't call me back until 8:15, and I didn't get out until 8:45! I was so mad! I had told my bosses that I would be a little late for work, but not that much. I ended up missing about an hour of work because I also had to stop for gas! Are nice teeth worth the hassle? : )

Just Like A Bulldog.

I hold grudges. For those of you who know me well, you know this. I've always been this way, and quite frankly I'm tired of it. For some reason, when someone hurts me or the people that I care about, my opinion of them forms and I cover it in Quick-Crete to set it into place, and nothing anyone says can change my mind. I hate this about myself. There have been so many times when I think I've finally forgiven them for whatever it is that they've done, but more likely than not, something makes me remember again and I'm back at square one. So I'm asking anyone who reads this to pray for me and my struggle with this. I'm trying to fix a lot of things about myself, and some things are easier than others. I'd appreciate it.

Opposites Attract.

Apparently so. Steve and I were talking last night and I mentioned that I have an unusual problem with the name Brian. Whenever I meet a Brian, I automatically start calling them David. How weird is that? I think it stems from when I was a teenager and I had a guy friend named Brian, who when he wasn't wearing a shirt, had an eerie resemblance to Michelangelo's David (don't think bad thoughts, we went swimming!). Anyways, Steve and I were talking, and I was trying to explain the Brian/David thing, but when I got to the point of saying "he was muscular, and he looked like David..." Steve cut me off and said "Like the Hulk? David Banner?" We started laughing because when I explained what I meant, he said that it just showed how differently our minds work. Complete different ends of the spectrum.
Poor Bear had to have his big boy surgery today. Steve said that bear was all sad and scared, and that made me feel so bad! I wish there was an easier way to have that done. He's such a sweet puppy and I hate to scare him or make him feel bad. He'll probably bite me the minute he sees me! I don't see how I could blame him, honestly! : (